Wednesday, October 12, 2022

Hick Does the Almost Unforgivable

We have been enjoying an ice cream renaissance here at our hillbilly mansion. Country Mart had a sale a while back, and I bought some Blue Bunny ice cream. It's delicious! Even though it isn't on sale now, I still buy it. Of course Hick doesn't NEED it, due his delicate medical condition. But just try telling HIM that. 

Because we have different tastes, I buy two kinds. I alternate between Cherry Chunk and Mint Chip. Hick is adventurous, and has experienced Bunny Tracks, Strawberry Cheesecake, Cookie Dough, and something that's vanilla with cookie dough, chocolate chunks, little M&M thingies, and a caramel swirl. I don't know which kind he was on at the time, but he ran out.

"You can have some of my Mint Chip before I go to the store. Just leave me enough for an ice cream cone."

"Oh. Okay. I like that kind."

Hick never met and ice cream he didn't like. Only an ice cream he didn't like as much.

I was sitting at the kitchen table, and didn't pay attention as he dipped out his (MY) ice cream at the cutting block.

"There. You have enough for a cone."

"Okay. I'll have it after while."

Hick had long since gone to bed by the time I got out the ice cream tub to make my cone.

 
Does that look like enough ice cream for a cone??? Let me answer for you (as I used to tell my students who deliberately refused to incriminate themselves when caught red-handed while participating in shenaniganery). NOT-HEAVEN, NO! 

I even have the smallest cones available in Country Mart, some kind of Keebler product.

 
See? I posed the cone in the ice cream tub. No way is that ice cream going to provide me with the cone to which I am accustomed!

I put all the remaining ice cream into my cone:

 
Yeah. Val is not some spindly waif who feels stuffed after eating her ice cream cone filled level with the top. Even more heartbreaking is what I had to do to get ice cream showing above the top of the cone:

 
I could only have ice cream in the MIDDLE of my cone. Not in the bottom, or a scoop on the top. Yes, I took these pictures so I could use them to shame Hick. As you might imagine, that didn't happen!

"You said you were leaving me enough ice cream for my cone! Then I get it out of the freezer after you're in bed, and THIS IS ALL THAT WAS LEFT!"

"Huh. It looked like enough for a cone."

I'm pretty sure the bowl he had piled high looked like enough for three cones! It really does not benefit me to be nice to Hick... If I pulled a thorn out of his paw, he would STILL eat me, and hope he didn't step on any more thorns.

6 comments:

  1. You have to NEVER EVER let Hick scoop out his own serving of YOUR ice cream. Let him complain as much as he wants, but don't let him serve himself. Tell him you are being careful because of his diabetes or something.

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    1. I don't really mind him having it, as long as he LEAVES ME ENOUGH FOR A CONE! Maybe I should have specified "a full cone with one scoop on top." It wouldn't have been a big deal if mine was also not about to run out.

      Heh, heh! I could outsmart him, and say I'll bring it to him in his recliner. Then I can fill one of his individual ice cream cups (which I can rescue and wash out and stash away for this purpose) with just that amount. That's all he needs anyway. With his delicate medical condition... What he piles in his bowl is about 4-5 individual cups equivalent. Yet when interrogated (I mean questioned), he says it's about 2 individual cups worth.

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  2. Let's try this again. I said the prayer to let me post a comment .... HeWho LOVES Blue Bunny ice cream! Vanilla is his favorite with that chocolate shell stuff on top. He figures it is a win even if he runs out of chocolate because it pairs with any kind of pie.

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    1. Blue Bunny is so smooth! Not icy at all. Must have a high fat content. Vanilla is my least favorite of the common flavors. So HeWho need not worry that I will cause a shortage.

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  3. Replies
    1. Yes. But it just made ME sign in to my own blog, to which I was ALREADY signed in!

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