Not Sure What Statement Is Being Made Here

On Errand Day Thursday, The Pony went into the post office lobby with me to buy stamps. Prices are going up soon, you know! I always chat with the counter clerk, who is a nice guy who invests in silver coins like The Pony. I ask him for pictures of his toddler, who is a little mini-him. I was sad to see that he was not working this day.

As The Pony and I stood in line behind one person, I spotted something beside the register that was closed.

"Pony! What IS that?"

"It's poop."

"That's what I thought. But WHY would they have poop on the counter?"

"Well. You know what I've told you about this place..."

"Yeah. It can be a poop-show. Get me a picture of that! But why in the world would they put that on the counter? What are they trying to say?"

"Iontknow." With a shrug.

We chatted with the gal working the counter. We did NOT ask her about the poop.

No Tell-Tale Heart in There

Hick has been working on the floor of Cheap House. He's been doing it without the help of Old Buddy, who was at the ER on Monday, getting checked out. Nothing was found. He goes there pretty regularly. Maybe he's back working with Hick now. I think he helped at the apartments on Wednesday.

Anyhoo... Hick is shoring up a part of the floor outside the bathroom. It had water damage, and was sagging. Might have been from the roof leak. Hick cut out the damaged part to see what was going on. This is what he found, and sent me a text.

"Look what I found under the floor."

"That is weird."

"I'm guessing that was the original floor."

"Strange to leave a rug when putting a new floor down."

"It's actually linoleum but looks like a rug."

"The part cut out probably have to cut a little more to get it level."

I don't understand what went on here originally. Was there a step down to that area? Why was a new floor put over part of the other floor? Did it settle THAT MUCH to justify a patch over it several inches higher? Hick said there was no step. Maybe somebody just did a higher floor over a whole room. Or maybe the entire house has this built-up floor, but nothing else is damaged and sagging.

Looks like Hick put in some new floor joists. I think he just laid that top section on to check how level it was. The plan is to get the floor with no sagging, then put down the subfloor of plywood. No laminate flooring. That will be something the buying flipper can decide on.

Anyhoo... Hick has a portion of unlevel floor to fix in the kitchen, under where the cabinets used to be. The he might paint the new trim board around the new roof. After that, he says we'll put Cheap House on the market, and he'll start working on Lap House. 

Could Hick Be Responsible for Pizza Hut's Demise

I was surprised last week to hear of Pizza Hut's demise. It was just a local franchise, over in Bill-Paying Town. The first inkling was an overhead conversation in the waiting room of my physical therapy office. Two old guys were commenting on seeing the furniture sitting out front of Pizza Hut, with signs that tables were $10 each, and chairs $5.

Back home, I was reading the local online newspaper, and saw a picture of that furniture. Seems the employees had been called in the previous evening for a meeting about "new menu items," but were then told the store was closing, so not to come back. The situation continues to be a mystery. But because of the location of that very Pizza Hut, I was reminded of our last experience there.

It was the early 1990s. Hick and I were living in my $17,000 house. We had HOS (Hick's Oldest Son) and The (little future) Veteran for the weekend. They were probably 8 and 10 years old. Saturday evening, we went over to the Bill-Paying Town Pizza Hut for supper. There was a closer Pizza Hut, but they didn't have a liquor license. Hick (and I, at that time) enjoyed a beer with our pizza.

As you might imagine on a small-town Saturday night, Pizza Hut was busy. We were escorted by the waitress to the atrium area. Which was like a clear-sided long room with curved glass walls and ceiling, like a greenhouse. That was fine with us, being seated in a smaller crowd. Hick ordered a pitcher of beer, a pitcher of root beer, a supreme pizza, and a pepperoni pizza. And breadsticks. 

It took about 15 minutes to get the drinks and breadsticks. Not too big a deal, because we could see they were busy. We chatted and drank and ate. Then we waited. For a long time. Over an hour. Other people who came in after us had gotten their food. Some had already eaten and left. Our breasticks were long gone, our pitchers empty. We had run out of conversation, save complaining about not having our pizza. Hick had stopped servers a couple times, to ask why we weren't getting our pizzas. They said they'd check on it.

Hick is usually not one to make a scene. He has quite a bit of patience with slow restaurant service, though he might grumble about a perceived slight. Then just not leave a good tip, if he feels the server did not make an effort to explain or remedy the situation. Now he'd had enough.

"Put on your coats, boys. We're leaving."

"But we didn't get our pizza!"

"It don't look like we're ever gonna get our pizza! We're going somewhere else."

We traipsed up the two steps from the atrium into the main dining room. Across the counter towards the door. Hick stopped at the register.

"I want my bill. I'm leaving."

"All right, sir. What did you get?"

"I didn't get SH!T. I've been here an hour and a half, and never got my pizza! I wanna pay for breadsticks, a pitcher of beer, and a pitcher of soda."

The boys eyes were huge. They knew Hick had a boiling point, and it had been reached. I shuffled them towards the door. As the cold air hit my face, I heard the young guy at the register say, "That's okay, sir. No charge for that. Sorry about your wait."

Which was excellent customer service, after such poor service. He probably feared for his life, from the look in Hick's eye. 

We piled into the car, sobered from the long wait, and the situation. Hick drove back to our town, to the Pizza Inn. Where we used the bathrooms, and the boys played the two video games on the back wall, while we waited 20 minutes for our two carry-out pizzas.

I don't THINK Hick's tirade in the early 90s could have attributed to the closure of this Pizza Hut. But if their service that night was any indication of how the place continued to operate, I'm not shocked that it closed down 30 years later.

More Weekend Harem-ing

Monday evening, Hick told me: "I think you was right about them gals at the apartments. One of them called me last night. She said, 'My bedroom door won't close.'"

"Of course! It was the weekend! They always need you on the weekend."

"I told her, 'I'll be there on Wednesday morning.' I don't know what she could have done to it, but it's not an emergency."

"Heh, heh! She wants to get you in her bedroom!"

"I don't think so. Them women are from 50 years old to 88 years old."

"Is this the one who drinks?"

"No. It's the youngest one. She annoys everybody else because she's kind of a busybody. But really, she's good for them, because she checks up on everyone. I need to talk to her anyway. She's got cardboard over her windows, and she's on the front of the building. We can't have that. It makes the building look junky."

"Maybe she's trying to block out the sun. That side faces south. She probably gets sun all day, and it's been so hot."

"She has heavy curtains to block out the sun."

"Maybe she doesn't want anybody seeing you in her bedroom, heh, heh!"

Sometimes I think the Harem is taking that building apart, piece by piece, to find ways to get Hick over there when they are lonely. Like on the weekends.

**********************************************************************

UPDATE

Wednesday evening, Hick hollered to the kitchen to ask if I wanted to hear a funny story. Well, of course! 

"You know that lady who called me about her bedroom door? I went to look at it today. You know why it wouldn't close? There was a shoe caught in it!"

"How is that possible?"

"It was stuck in the jamb, keeping it from closing."

"Couldn't she see it?"

"The shoe was behind the door. But had got caught, and when she tried to close it, the shoe kept it from closing."

"What kind of shoe? How could she not notice?"

"It was some flat slipper shoe."

"What did she say when you told her?"

"Nothing. But it was good that I went anyway, because we had to fix her sink. It had a leak."

Funny how that lady never mentioned a sink leak. I guess that wouldn't achieve her purpose of GETTING HICK INTO HER BEDROOM!

The Manager Looks Forward to an Addition to Her Family; Thevictorians to an Addition to Their Savings

The Credit Union Gal called me back after about an hour, regarding my request for info on getting an additional 1% interest increase on our maturing CD. She started out by saying, 

"Well, I was partially right. I was telling you the requirements for opening a NEW CD."

That was a bit off-putting. It reminded me of the time I was helping an at-risk 8th-grader with her math, and she said I was wrong, and wanted a pass to see her math teacher to verify my wrongness. When she returned, she started off by saying, "ONE of us was right." Which was me, because I am perfectly capable of doing 8th-grade math.

Anyhoo... Credit Union Gal was really polite, so I didn't take issue with her attempt to save face. Even though I am perfectly capable of reading English, and what she said about a new CD STILL wasn't what was written on the credit union website, nor the printed program from the annual dinner.

Credit Union Gal apologized for taking so long to return my call. She said the maternity-leave manager with all the info had been IN A DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT. At least she wasn't in labor! 

Credit Union Gal said she could cash out our CDs, and open the new ones. There would be no 30-day wait. Just walk in, and she'd do it right then. However... she suggested waiting until Wednesday, because there was a board meeting Tuesday night, and she didn't know if interest rates might increase. So she wanted us to get the best rate possible.

I said what if the interest rate WENT DOWN? Credit Union Gal said she didn't expect it. And not to worry, because she already had permission to give us the current rate, even IF rates went down. Also, she thought she could give us the 1% increase on BOTH CDs. I reminded her that the program stated it was only for ONE certificate. She said she would do both, and if that wasn't allowed, she would make sure the CD with the most money got the increase. Hick says we got it on both last year, so it might be possible.

Anyhoo... I thanked Credit Union Gal for going to the trouble to check on it for me. She even offered to call me on Wednesday morning, to tell me the new interest rate, but I said Hick would be coming in that day anyway, so no need.

I'm really glad I called ahead and got this matter straightened out. Otherwise, Hick would have gone in and been cheated out of our 1% interest increase. Or more likely, have become cantankerous and made a scene. Like that one time, in Pizza Hut... but that's a story for another day. Or never.

While I Don't Begrudge Someone Having a Baby...

The timing is terrible for US! How dare a working woman procreate on OUR TIME!

Thevictorians have two CDs that matured on Sunday. Of course our credit union is not open on Sundays. But we have a 10-day grace period to decide if we roll it over, or do something else. In this case, it's SOMETHING ELSE. That's because we can get a 1% interest rate boost, since Hick attended the annual meeting/dinner. The increase is only for a new CD. It says so right there on the program he has to show to get the boost:

1% New CD Rate Increase

This should be no problem. Last year we did the same thing. All it required was walking in and asking for it. I was smart (you know that, right?) and asked what we needed to do while I was there depositing The Pony's house payment. The teller consulted the manager, who was at a desk behind the window. She said when the maturity date arrived, to come in and they'd do it. 

I called the office on that maturity date, and they said they'd get everything ready, and Hick could just stop by and sign. Easy peasy. I saved him a few minutes of wait by calling.

Well. I tried that Monday morning. The gal I got gave me some misinformation! She told me that the 1% rate increase for the meeting attendance ONLY APPLIED TO NEW MONEY! And that we would have to cash out our CD, and wait 30 days to put it back into a new CD. This is NOT what happened last year. And I was looking at their (terrible) website at the time, reading right off the screen:

TEMPORARY CD SPECIALS

(new money ONLY cannot be used with annual meeting offers)

Which seems to be the direct opposite of what she told me! Besides, once that money is cashed out, it's OURS, right? So who says we can't put OUR money into a new CD? What's with the 30-day wait?

I was polite. I explained how we did this last years. She said that she would check on it for me. That the manager was on maternity leave, but they have access to her. I certainly hope she is not in active labor! But still, how inconsiderate of that manager not to consult us about our CD maturity date before having a little bundle of joy put into her oven!

As I write this, I've been waiting 45 minutes for my call-back. Hopefully there's no case of a 9-day labor. We are rightfully due our 1% interest rate increase. After all, Hick went to eat a free meal once a year. He endured that hardship with good faith!

The local financial world should not come to a standstill because a woman has a baby.

Just Checking

Hick is not allowed access to our checkbook. Before you judge me as controlling, conniving, embezzling, or petty, let's remember that Hick's filing cabinet is the cab of SilverRedO. He is not the most meticulous record-keeper. My method might involve cast-off Save A Lot boxes on the kitchen table, but I know where the documents are "filed." I keep a tight rein on the checks and the checkbook register. They are my chronological "vault" of expenses outlaid on the flip houses.

Hick has been waiting to pay his roofing guy until all finishing touches were completed on the Cheap House roof. Last Sunday, he said he wanted a check, because Roofing Guy was finishing up the next day. I gave Hick a single check. He tucked it in his billfold. That is a problem.

Hick's billfold is like George Costanza's wallet. It is overstuffed, waiting to explode. [George's Exploding Wallet , YouTube 25 seconds] I also think it makes Hick sit sideways, though I do not believe he carries hard candy in it. Hick keeps his billfold closed with a bright red rubber bracelet thingy like was so popular for promoting causes back in the early 2000s. A check is not safe there for long. It comes out with tri-fold bends, and frayed along the top edge.

Every day I asked Hick if he'd given Roofing Guy the check. "No. He was busy with his courier business. Guys didn't show up to work. He'll do it tomorrow." That went on all week. As you might assume, the bills kept coming. I had to write other checks. This one was getting out of order.

Saturday night, I asked Hick for that check.

"Can you give it back to me? I'm going to write out two more bills, and this one is already two behind.  This will make it four. I'll give you another one."

"No! Roofing Guy is coming by my shop tomorrow. He said so. I'll give it to him then."

I hope that check is not too frayed to run through the processing machinery at the bank!