Wednesday, September 30, 2020
Val Couldn't Get Forked at the Casino
Tuesday, September 29, 2020
The Pony Locks Down His Thunder So Val Cannot Abscond With It
Monday, September 28, 2020
Selfishness For Thee But Not For Me
Sunday, September 27, 2020
YayHills Are the New Creachers
Saturday, September 26, 2020
Val's Week Ends in PENCE-DIMEonium
Penny # 111, 112.
Dime # 20, 21.
Nickel still at 10.
Quarter still at 1.
Friday, September 25, 2020
That's Casino Robbery!
Thursday, September 24, 2020
Wednesday, September 23, 2020
If You Go Down In the Woods Today, Beware of a Big Surprise
Hick went down in the woods Monday, and it was NO PICNIC!
Remember how we've been having some unwanted activity around our enclave? Like the white Dodge sedan that parked overnight on our Other 10 Acres, then was seen elsewhere on our gravel roads? And the guy breaking into a neighbor's house, caught on camera? There's MORE!
Wednesday evening, the guy whose kids vandalized Hick's Creekside Cabin called Hick to say that he'd just run off some people in a side-by-side who were riding around by a house that's for sale. He asked if they lived here, and they said no, they lived out on one of the nearby county blacktop roads. So he told them they were trespassing, and to get on out of here, and not come back. I find a certain satisfaction in that irony, he himself the parent of trespassers...
Sunday evening, Hick was called by a guy who said there was somebody burning stuff on our Other 10 Acres. He went up there, but only saw two small piles of sticks, which the lady living next door likes to burn. Sure, it was on our side of the property line, but Hick didn't even stop. He said maybe she'll rake up some sticks from OUR side and burn them.
Monday, Hick decided to go up to our Other 10 Acres and look around. He drove the tractor, planning to move a few more logs along the frontage, to keep people from driving in. A car won't make it, but currently a 4-wheeler or 4WD truck could. He'd been gone about an hour when he texted me.
"Just found an abandoned truck down in the woods at our Other 10 Acres."
"Are you calling the police? Might be stolen."
"Yes. Waiting on them to call me back."
"Did you ask HOS if he knows anything about it?" [Hick's Oldest Son, who used to live up there until last summer, when he moved into the $5000 House he and Hick renovated.]
"Yes. He said he saw it a while back, and sent me pictures. I never got them.
"Huh. Seems pretty random for a stranger to leave it. And when was HOS out here, and why didn't he call you? Last I remember, he texted you he was up there getting some of his stuff. That was before you put the log across the driveway."
"He said since I didn't text him back, he figured I didn't care. He's re-sending the picture. Somebody has been cutting wood. Looks like trees on the ground. Maybe to make a fire."
"Might be something with the neighbors or people they know."
"No. I asked them. They saw a couple trucks up here a few weeks ago, but said they left pretty quick. I'm still waiting on the deputies. It must be shift change for them. It's 3:00."
The county sheriff's deputy arrived, and ran the VIN. As he called it in on the radio, he said, "It looks like it could be the truck the Backroads police chased out here a few weeks ago. They lost it on [county blacktop road where are mailboxes are]."
Hick got more information, by eavesdropping, and by making conversation while waiting for the county to send a tow truck.
The Backroads police know who was driving the truck when they chased it. They know the truck was reported stolen from a little town over by Bill-Paying town, about three weeks ago. At the time, it had a motorcycle in the back. Gone now.
Hick showed the deputy the picture of the house-breaker-inner, INSIDE the house, that the owner had put on the enclave's Facebook page. And said people out here think he lives in the house by our Other 10 Acres, where the stick-burning lady lives. The deputy said they are acquainted with that guy, and he has been involved in a lot of stuff, and they are investigating.
Oh, and such a coincidence... the guy who the truck belonged to just happened to call the dispatcher while Hick and the deputy were waiting for the tow truck, asking if they had any information lately on his stolen truck. Maybe he was listening to a scanner, and heard about a truck found on someone's property.
Something is pretty fishy here. Not pointing any fingers. I'm not a big believer in coincidences. Somebody knows somebody who knows something.
It looks like a little one, but it's a Ford F-150. Took two tow trucks to get it out. A 4WD wrecker to hook up to it and pull it to the gravel road, and a flat-bed tilting car-hauler to take it to town. Hick volunteered to use his tractor if they couldn't get it. The deputy said, "This is going to cost that guy more than the truck is worth! He's already said he doesn't have insurance on it."
Tuesday, September 22, 2020
And Now, the Requisite Weirdo Encounter
This was not a great bonus, and I can't even explain what paid off. First of all, I don't understand anything about Brazil, except that you get a bonus with three big green fish (that look like piranhas to me), shown in the top right screen. The bonus gives you 5 free spins, of only one screen. If you get gold butterflies, that's good, because they are wild, and they lock in place, and give you a replay of your win. So in effect, it's like hitting a 2X your win. Here, the bonus already ended, and the screen went back to when the bonus hit. The total bet was $2.00 a spin, with each individual game being worth a $.50 spin.
ENTER THE WEIRDO!
I was thinking about moving back to my favorite machine, but I fed this one a twenty to see if it would do any good on Buffalo. I was only a couple spins in when I heard a guy at the bar to my right, ordering a beer. He sounded friendly and polite. Maybe overly so...
Of course Beersly came over and sat down at MY slot! I mean, the one I was thinking about playing. My former jackpot winner. Dang it! I made up my mind to lose that twenty (or win big, but that rarely happens), and move on. I hate playing with someone next to me. Even though there was a see-through plastic divider sticking out past my shoulder, and I was wearing the required mask. I didn't even notice if Beersly was wearing one! It's not a big deal to me, with that divider acting as a sneeze guard. I felt as safe as a buffet salad bar!
Anyhoo... Beersly sat down and greeted me. "Hey, how ya doin'? Get anything good?"
Monday, September 21, 2020
Val and Hick Have a FAIRLY Good Lunch at the Casino
Sunday, September 20, 2020
Hick, in the Casino, With a Dope
Saturday, September 19, 2020
19 CENTS on the 19th, for Val's Future Pennyillionaire Fortune!
Maybe OTHER people are also plastic Christmas mooses, dropping money out of THEIR butts, as they walk out the door.
Penny # 107, 108, 109, 110.
Dime # 19.
Nickel # 10.
Quarter still at 1.
Friday, September 18, 2020
The Schemer Asks Val To Provide a Schematic
"If I email you a picture of a schematic, can you print it for me?"
"Where did you get it?"
"Off my phone."
"I KNOW that! Where did it come from?"
"Off the internet."
"I know that."
"Well I don't know how much more you want me to say. Can you print it?"
"Last time I printed one, you said it was too small. I can't blow it up."
"Well I can blow it up on my phone. But it's hard to hold my phone while I'm working over in the BARn. Can't you print a whole page? Doesn't it fill the page?"
"Maybe, depends on the size of it. When do you need it?"
"Not soon. Just by tomorrow."
"It's already 7:40 p.m.!"
Hick had no response to that. So I tried. Dowloaded his picture of the schematic showing 38 parts of a shotgun, numbered in the order to take them apart, maybe? Or put back together? I don't read schematics.
The top half was in big bold print: Harrington and Richardson Shotguns. It had a model number. The schematic was the bottom half of the page. I opened it in PAINT, and cropped just the parts, mainly.
I tried to print, but my printer was dead. Oh, it had the green flashing light. But it made no noise like it was limbering up for a print job. It has been doing this since I replaced the ink cartridge. I went into TROUBLESHOOTING, but it just showed the job was pending. Not failed, or whatever that message is.
I looked over my printer. Pushed the OKAY button. The green light went from flashing to solid. No sound of printing. I went back to the DEVICES and the TROUBLESHOOTING. Wait a minute! The job was trying to print to the WORKSHOP PRINTER. The color printer that Genius brought home and gave to me. I switched to my LaserJet, and it worked!
Thursday, September 17, 2020
Gone in 360 Seconds
Wednesday, September 16, 2020
Hick Spots a Black Panther
Tuesday, September 15, 2020
Moose Pooping Money Butt
Monday, I got an envelope out of EmBee. It looked like junk mail to me. I was about ready to throw it away with the catalog from Uncommon Goods, and the AARP Bulletin. But since it was addressed to ME, and had the word INSURANCE in the return address, I ripped it open while sitting in T-Hoe.
It was a CHECK, by cracky! A check for $54.50. Val was not born yesterday. She has gotten many a fake check in her day. Checks that look like checks, but are only applicable to specific merchandise that you purchase from the entity who sent out the check. Not a REAL check. So I started reading what came along with this check, which was from a supplemental insurance company we shall call PISSY. I had not had any PISSY dealings for at least two years. Maybe three.