I'm on Day 8 of my sickness. I try to stay hydrated, so I can cough up phlegm as need be. It's not like I have a constant cough, but when I breathe too deeply, it sets off that cough reflex. So I harumph until that fluid comes up.
Here's the thing. Hick has some very strange ideas concerning my recovery.
"At least I'm coughing that stuff up. Eventually, it's all gotta come out."
"I know I hear you coughing it up. But then you just swallow it back down. How are you ever going to get better like that?"
"Um. I don't swallow it back down into my LUNGS! What would you suggest I do?"
"Spit it out."
"So everybody who ever coughs spits out what they cough up?"
"Yes."
"I don't think so. You don't."
"I do too! When I'm outside. You just don't get out. Almost everybody spits that out when they cough it up."
"What am I supposed to spit it in?"
"I don't know. A cup?"
"Okay. So I'm supposed to have a cup here in the living room, a cup in the kitchen, a cup in the bathroom, and a cup beside the bed."
"If you need to."
"That's just ridiculous. People don't do that."
Sorry. I can't take this advice from the man who sneezes 20 times in a row, and sucks the snot back into his nose every couple sneezes, rather than use a tissue to blow his nose.
Oh, Hick. Don't swallow, spit. Every farm boy I knew was really good at spitting. My oldest brother spat at my feet, and the other brothers laughed. Bastards.
ReplyDeleteFunny how I don't notice Hick spitting out his harumph-up while he's in the house.
DeleteNow I'm going to be sick.
ReplyDeleteGet better quickly!
The title should have served as a red flag. There is nothing I would love more than to wake up cured. I think we're headed back to convenient care on Monday.
DeleteSadly, I see far too many people using Hick's method of hawking and spitting in the streets here and even more in the city. I once lived across the road from an elderly gentleman who used the street gutter outside his gate every morning at 6am. It's disgusting.
ReplyDeleteSome of the high school boys would blow their nose like that in PE! Just lean over, hold one nostril closed, and snort snot onto the ground!
DeleteWell, I guess that wins the argument for everyone who takes their shoes off before they go any further than just inside the front door,and demand that visitors do, too.
ReplyDeleteYes, they now look wise instead of controlling!
DeleteYears agomy grandma's doctor told her to swallow and her bbody would rid itself of the phlegm. Sounds logical. Hope you feel better soon.
ReplyDelete