Sunday, January 9, 2022


The Pony's tailbone is not even recovered from his rumpus-bouncing slalom down the metal steps of the USPS loading dock, and he has already added two more falls to his workplace accident repertoire.

Friday night, The Pony did not bring his Casey's pizza to the marred coffee table to eat while sitting on the floor and dropping greasy sausage onto my carpet (which is halfway sausage-proof, having a coating of the wax he'd spilled from my scented wax thingy).

"Oh, aren't you coming in to chat with us before your bath?"

"No. I'm eating in the kitchen, standing. I don't want to sit down until I'm in the bath. I fell again today. It was in Dad's pharmacy."

"Did them girls behind the counter see you?"

"EVERYBODY saw me! I had just stepped off the rug as I came in the door. The snow was packed in the gripper things on my shoes, and I went down on the meaty part of my hip. But at least I avoided my tailbone."

"Did they say, 'Ooooh!'"
"They were, but I jumped up and said, 'This isn't even near the worst I have fallen!'"
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah. It's sore. I'll probably have a big bruise."
On Saturday, The Pony revealed that he'd fallen again.
"Was it in the pharmacy?"
"No. But they sure didn't let me forget. One of them said, 'Oh, you're not going to fall again today, are you?' They didn't have any mail to take in today, but they always have a box out. It's for UPS, and we're not supposed to take it. But you never know if it's one for us until you ask."
"So how did you fall today?"
"I was walking down a hill. I always avoid muddy or wet areas. This was on grass, but it just gave way under my foot. I let myself fall. Rather than throw out an arm to catch myself. I didn't want to break a wrist. I landed on my side hip. You can probably see the mark."
"Yeah. That's dirt and grass stain. You should let those pants soak for 30 minutes in Tide With Bleach."
"I don't use bleach."
"It's built in! You'd better LEARN to use it."
Because, you see, The Pony seems to have a bad case of BUTTERFEET. He's one of those people who can't seem to stay upright. He's a NOT-WEEBLE. He doesn't wobble, but he does fall down!


  1. Perhaps he needs extra grippers put on over the first pair and every now and then he needs to knock his boots against something to knock out the packed snow. And perhaps just roll down the grassy slopes instead of trying to walk down them.

    1. Heh, heh! The Pony wore 3 pairs of pants, so he might as well put on 2 pairs of grippers. Hick also suggested knocking his feet to shake out the snow. Which earned him a reply of, "Dad, I'm NOT an idiot." The Pony seems to say that a lot...

      The Pony could take a little leap and land on his rumpus already sliding. Like the way passengers on a plane are shown to slide down that inflatable ramp in an emergency!

  2. Poor Pony!! He needs to add some epsom salts to his bath time.

    1. I don't know, that might interact with the VINEGAR The Pony uses to cut through the hard-water deposits that cook onto the sides of the tub (as Hick describes it) during those 2-hour baths with the jets churning.

      We don't want The Pony to be a science experiment, shooting out the top of a watery volcano! Of course, being a chemical engineer, he should know the risks of interaction.

  3. I think Pony needs to be covered in bubble-wrap!

    1. I agree! At least from the rumpus on down. I bet he could buy some bubble wrap at the post office! They have it out by the counter. Along with tape, to put his broken bones back together. Maybe he should start a tab.