Wednesday, June 2, 2021

Thank Goodness Val Has a Huge Butt

Is MEAT the new TOILET PAPER?
 
That's a question. Not a statement, not a supposition. Val will NOT be held responsible for a wave of meat-hoarding!

The reason I ask is because I read about a cyberattack on a meat-supplying company, and that's all people need to hear a whisper of to set them off. Just like any mention of possible snow sends Backroads denizens out to buy mass quantities of bread and milk until the shelves are empty, this information could drive a possible meat shortage. Not a lack of meat being processed and shipped. A lack of meat being processed and shipped fast enough TO FILL THE SHELVES EMPTIED BY HOARDERS!

Don't think I'm worried. I have a HUGE butt. Hey! Don't go there! I have a huge BOSTON BUTT. A pork loin. Some might describe it as "ample." There's plenty of butt to give us a cushion for our household meat supply.
 
Even top carnivore Hick will survive a meat shortage. We still have that FREE Ponytail Guy food, you know. So technically, we'll be surviving on the Ponytail Guy's butt.

4 comments:

  1. Do not let the news out that you have ample. Meat marauders may happen by at night.

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    1. Well, good luck to them! They won't know which themed shed Hick is hiding in to play the recorded sound of a warning shot to discourage their marauding! I'm betting that Hick has a "uniform" to wear for each themed shed. Shh... he'll probably choose The Pony's Knife Shack over the Little Barbershop of Horrors or the Railroad Car Shack.

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  2. I heard about that cyber attack and thought it was here in Australia, perhaps I should pay more attention to the news, but that is my dishwashing time. Perhaps it is a world wide thing and people everywhere will run short of steaks and butts, which we call rumps. As in rump roast, rump steak, etc
    I don't eat a lot of meat, it's too expensive, so I'll manage any shortage just fine.

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    1. I remember it as mainly Canada, but 20 percent of the US beef supply (and chicken!) could be affected. So maybe it has a worldwide component.

      One thing's for certain: meat will only get MORE expensive!

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