Tuesday, July 12, 2022

Good-Ex, Bad-Ex, FedEx (Part 1)

Last week, I was expecting two pairs of shoes to be delivered. No. I don't have four feet. One pair was for Hick, and the other for The Pony. I had a 25% OFF code that was good until the end of June, so I had ordered them both a pair that they'd had before, and fit right. The Pony paid me for his shoes, but was taking advantage of the discount, so the shoes shipped to me. The only delivery option was FedEx. You might recall that I am not a big fan of FedEx, and will choose any other delivery method that's available.
As per the last order, The Pony's shoes would take a couple extra days, because they were New Balance, and shipped from California. Hick's were Skechers, which shipped sooner, but had some clause about the discount. Anyhoo... I was expecting two pairs of shoes, a couple days apart. Tuesday morning, I got an email from FedEx saying my package was out for delivery.
Tuesday, on my way to town in the late afternoon, I encountered a boxy FedEx truck trying to come up the gravel hill as I was going down. I had just passed the Badly Blacktopped By Hick and Buddy section, and was nearing the tiny bridge that floods fast and recedes fast. I pulled T-Hoe off to the right as far as I could. It's not like there's a shoulder. Just the edge of the gravel, then trees.
The FedEx truck came over the tiny bridge, then moved as far to his right as he could. I crept along and put down my window, motioning for him to do the same. He did. It was a young dude who looked disturbingly like that parade shooter guy, but without colored hair and facial tattoos.
"Are you going to 1313 Mockingbird Lane?" [Not my real address, but the Munsters from TV] 


"You have my package. It's a pair of shoes. I can take them now, and save you from getting barked at by the dogs."

"And I can avoid this road. I'm not crazy about going up there. What's your name?"

"Val Thevictorian."

"Okay. Let me check."

Young Dude walked out of sight into the back of his boxy truck. He was gone a minute. Then returned, holding a box, and sat down in the driver's seat. He extended that box out the window to me. Well. It was quite a stretch. I'd assumed his young legs could step down from the truck and his young arms could extend that package through T-Hoe's window. But it is what it is. Young Dude DID help me out by giving me the package so I didn't worry about it being delivered while I was in town.

I opened my door and leaned way out, grabbing my package. It was unbalanced and dusty, but I juggled it a bit and pulled it into T-Hoe's confines.

"Thank you!"

"If you wait a minute, I'll back out and get out of your way."

"No need. I can get through. I'll get out of YOUR way so you can back over that bridge."

Off I went. I couldn't see in my mirror, because the road over the tiny bridge curves up and to the right, then left. I assume Young Dude maneuvered that boxy FedEx truck back out, and went on his way, having saved about 10 minutes on his route.

That's one of the most pleasant FedEx experiences I've ever experienced. The delivery of The Pony's shoes two days later... not so much.



  1. You are a gracious receiver. My friend and I chased a Fed Ex driver once who was delivering homemade saucer-sized chocolate chip cookies from my brother out of town. Scared the poor guy!

    1. I am gracious, but Genius is not! Before he was driving age, he made me track down a FedEx driver who had skipped our delivery, saying we were a business, and were closed for some holiday like Flag Day.

      Genius had been waiting all day for that package. Probably something electronic or camera-related. When he saw the tracking said it was not delivered for that reason, he called to complain, and found out where that driver was. Only about 3 miles from us, delivering to a paintball supply store.

      We got there and saw the truck on the parking lot. Genius ran in loaded for bear, and was soon following the driver out and getting his package! That boy was tenacious, even at a young age!

  2. Genius has some of my mother's go get'em! I'm almost always home when deliveries arrive so that's no problem. There was a day last month when I arrived home just as a courier was putting something back into his truck and I asked if he had anything for No XX and he said "I was just putting it back for tomorrow's delivery", then handed it to me. A half hour later I had a text saying the delivery was on its way (*~*)

    1. Their left hand doesn't know what their right hand is doing! At least that courier was protecting the package from theft. Not setting it out on a silver platter with a sign saying TAKE ME.