Friday, August 30, 2013

Val Continues To Depreciate

Oh, how my stock has fallen! It continues to plummet. This $8-daughter is on an express elevator to not-heaven. Today, my very own mother, the one I picked up at the park in 98-degree heat, and drove around on my monetary errands under the cool breath of T-Hoe, stuffed a mere $4 in my cup.

Don't go thinking that Val is some kind of privileged panhandler, driving around Backroads in a Tahoe, rattling a 44 oz. styrofoam cup for donations. No. I had my cup ready for the daily Diet Coke. And in the midst of my many errands, stopped to get The Pony, a ravenous after-school beast, some waffle fries and a root beer. Mom peeled off four ones. "Here. Let me give you this. For The Pony." I was driving at the time. I may or may not have waved my hand dismissively, letting her know that I didn't need her money. At least not at that instant. And she shoved those bills down into my 44 oz. cup!

Let the record show that it was not a malicious act. She was not trying to slice a leak, thus depriving me of my single daily pleasure. I had already put ten twenties in there. The bank refused to take them as a deposit! What's the world coming to, when you can't deposit cash into someone's account if you don't know their account number? It's not like I'm a Nigerian scammer. Genius needs his monthly allowance. The drive-thru teller's excuse was that there have been too many complaints about money being deposited in the wrong accounts. Seriously? I'm betting the account-holders were not the ones complaining. What's up with that? Is everybody dumping money into John Smith's account? Now I have to go back to the bank tomorrow with a deposit slip. Oh, and I also had to put three deposit receipts from my savings&loan in there. As well as two receipts from the credit union. But that didn't mean Mom could jam four ones in there indiscriminately. I have a sneaking suspicion they were not facing the same way, and some were floppy, and they infiltrated the ordered chaos of my circular file.

I need to go call her before she goes to bed. I have some spoilers from Big Brother that might raise my current daughterly value.

3 comments:

  1. $4? That's pitiful. I can't mention what can be purchased for $4 on St. Louis city streets...You'd be appalled.

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  2. I can't put money in my son's account without his account number. You'd think that a birth date and social security number would be enough, but then I don't know our sons SS number so I guess it doesn't really matter.

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  3. Sioux,
    I'd be appalled, because that $4 was FOR THE PONY! According to Hick, some things could be purchased for nothing, during the lunch hour, in a truck with a camper shell, on the parking lot behind his old workplace near Vandeventer and Tower Grove.

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    Stephen,
    To add insult to my imagined injury...my name was on that very account until July. AND, the deposit slip I used today had my name and his printed right up top. But they took it.

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