Pardon me while I address those summer vacation caravans who pull into our little burg of Backroads and proceed to de-poop their animals on our landscaped restaurant lawns. YOU PEOPLE ARE FOUL!
Okay. I feel a teeny tiny bit better. Here's the deal. We have a Dairy Queen just off the interstate. The owners have been improving their property this summer with a new building facade, a new sign, and a new roof over their previously bare drive-thru window. They already have a nice metal-bar enclosed playground for the kids, with tables and a little covered pavilion thingy. The parents can eat inside, soaking up the air-conditioning while watching the kiddies play through the front windows. Or they can sit outside with them.
Across a strip of parking lot from the barred playground, there's a well-maintained section of grass that merges up on the stoplight and road right-of-way. Every day, while waiting in line catty-corner from the DQ in my gas station chicken store with my 44 oz. Diet Coke, I see a carload of people pull in and walk their leashed dogs on that grassy area. And by "walk," I mean stand and watch the pets poop. On the grassy area. Without even an inside-out baggie or old Walmart bag to pick up the poop for disposal. So the kiddies and their parents, enjoying almost-ice-cream or Dilly Bars or an Arctic Rush that used to be a Mr. Misty get to gaze upon piles of dog turds. Oh, and what IF those free-poopers actually scooped? Would they take their turds away, or stuff them in the DQ trash receptacle?
THIS IS SO UNSANITARY!
I mentioned it off-handedly to The Pony as we drove past. Okay. I ranted about it to The Pony. "Look at that! That's nasty! Who wants to look at dogs pooping while they're having lunch?"
"Kids. Kids love that stuff. They'd love to get ahold of them if they could escape from those bars."
"No. The piles of poop."
Kids these days. They don't know how to work up a good head of indignation.