Sunday, April 25, 2021

The Catbird Has Returned...

Genius does not seem to have inherited Val's gift of gambling. He must take after Hick when it comes to wagering. Genius rarely plays the games of chance. The exception being the scratchers I mail him in his weekly letter. Saturday, I was surprised to receive a text from him. I knew he and Friend had some buddies coming in from Kansas City, but I didn't know Genius was going to a casino. I think it's been a year since he last went. Looks like he was down to $2.45, on a 60-cent bet.

"Not a promising day."

"'I said there'd be days like this, there'd be days like this, I said.' That's from a song, young whippersnapper."

"I DID know the song. We've been here for about 2 hours. I hit one $40 Super Wheel on those president dollar sky wheel machines, but that's it. I'm down for the day."

"You gotta spend money to win money!"

"It's my favorite machine. The Super Wheels and the Quick Hits are my go-to's."

"I like the Wonder 4 games."

"Friend played one of those quad games."

"They're expensive, but they can pay big. $8,600 big!"

"Between the five of us, everyone is down $60-150."

"The casino has to make its money back after being shut down for months."

"They turned down the win percentage to zero. We head home (significant) losers."

"I am also a loser for two days now, on scratchers."

Yes, the gravy train hurtled over the cliff into the dry gorge. I jumped out at the last minute, and am now limping down the tracks, looking for a side-car to propel myself back to Easy Street. 

It was fun while it lasted. Sitting in the catbird's seat, my feet propped up, counting my winnings. Until I heard:

'Ahem! I believe you are Val... if that's what you call yourself. You seem to be IN MY SEAT. I will thank you kindly to remove your ample rumpus forthwith.'

Duly noted. I was only keeping it warm. Back to the OPC (Old People Chair) for me.


  1. I find that you have to spend money to lose money even faster.

    1. That's why I cheerfully volunteer to gamble FOR ALL OF MY READERS! I'll lose (or win $8,600) so you don't have to!

  2. Someone booted you out of a comfortable seat? Did Dr Sheldon Cooper "That is my spot" visit you?
    I'll continue to avoid casinos.

    1. I got booted from the winner's circle! Dr Sheldon Cooper doesn't scare me. I kind of raised two of him...

      I am selflessly forcing myself to go to casinos, in order to allow ALL OF MY READERS TO STAY OUT OF THEM! You can vicariously experience the thrill of the big win (once in a lifetime), and the semi-monthly agony of defeat at the hand of a one-armed bandit.

  3. You mean to tell us you were unseated? That's just wrong. Agony of defeat is where I'm at also.

    1. I was. But yesterday, like Kramer as a seat-filler at The Tony Awards, I slid back into the catbird's seat momentarily, as I won $85 on scratchers. I don't know when our next casino trip will be. The Pony and Hick have engagements all next week.