Click Click Rrrrr

Never a dull moment in VALtown. When I think I've run out of material, and have nothing for the morrow...all I have to do is make a trip to town.

I'd already obtained my 44 oz Diet Coke at The Gas Station Chicken Store on Wednesday, and picked up some scratchers from Country Mart's machines, and was tooling out of the parking lot, happily unaware that my tickets were losers, when it happened.

CLICK CLICK RRRRR

Huh. That's odd. What in the world was my Shaming Bracelet trying to tell me now? It gives random beeps and boops throughout the day. Mostly when I'm too sedentary, and unlikely to achieve my day's goal, which thanks to Genius's miscalculations when programming it at Christmas on December 30...is now 4 MILES per day. Rather than my usual 1.5 miles.

Anyhoo...I was making the turn onto the parking lot's exit road when

CLICK CLICK RRRRR

happened. I didn't want to glance down to see what symbol was on my Shaming Bracelet. I knew for sure that I hadn't walked 4 MILES, and besides, the sound wasn't the one I hear when GOAL! and digital balloons cover the screen. I held my left wrist to my ear.

CLICK CLICK RRRRR

Well. That sound wasn't coming from my Shaming Bracelet! It was coming from T-Hoe! That quickened my heartbeat a bit, though I'm sure my Shaming Bracelet didn't give me credit. What if

CLICK CLICK RRRRR

had something to do with that faulty airbag that OnStar said T-Hoe had a recall for, but no repairs were yet available! Was I going be pierced with shrapnel forthwith? This couldn't be good. What if T-Hoe was about to throw a rod? I don't know that that entails, but I'm sure that wouldn't be good! What if a piece of T-Hoe fell off? Or what if something extra (hopefully not a kitten, NO NO NO, got into the engine, like that time I was in kindergarten and my dad went out to start his truck one chilly morning)?

Everything seemed to be working as normal. Had brakes. Had power steering. Had acceleration. Had radio and gauges. GAUGES! Check the gauges! T-Hoe is so old that his gauges are still like little dials. Not digital.

The gauge on the upper left looks like a genie lamp with something dripping out the spout. I'm thinking maybe it stands for oil pressure, but I know less about cars than I know about the geography of the UK. The dial goes from 0 to 80, and the needle hovered a bit shy of and then a bit over 40, depending on whether I was waiting to pull out onto the road, or actually accelerating. So that seemed okay.

The gauge on the upper right is the battery. I'm pretty sure. I know what a battery looks like, and this symbol is rectangular, with a couple bumps on the top. It goes from 9 to 19, and the needle was just over the middle marking of 14. Hick has been saying I might need a new battery, but the needle is always in this zone when I look at it. So that seemed okay.

The gauge on the bottom right looks like a sailboat's mast riding on waves. I'm not sure about this. Maybe it's supposed to be a thermometer? Or something to do with the radiator? Some other fluid? It goes from 160 to 260, and the needle was straight up, in the middle, on the 200 mark. So it seemed okay.

WHOA! The CHECK ENGINE symbol popped up while I was looking at the gauges, while stopped waiting for traffic to pass so I could pull onto the road that takes me to my left-turn light to get on the lettered highway that takes me home. I KNOW the CHECK ENGINE light. It's an orange outline of a motor. Throughout my quick inspection of T-Hoe's dashboard, there was the constant

CLICK CLICK RRRRR

I was leery of driving home. It's just 5 miles, taking 10 minutes, but I sure didn't want to break down on the way. There's no shoulder! And it was 27 degrees! Who knows where Hick was. In the BARn, nobody can hear you call. I'd just pulled onto the road, but quickly made a left into the area that harbors my pharmacy, Hardee's, and Dairy Queen. I pulled onto the Dairy Queen lot, making sure not to strand T-Hoe on top of a giant rock like that one lady. I parked, and left T-Hoe running. Because I wasn't quite sure if he'd start up again. My intention was to call Hick, and let him hear the

CLICK CLICK RRRRR

Lucky for me, Hick was asleep in the La-Z-Boy! When I left, he'd been eating a ham sandwich, planning to take some stuff to the BARn. Double-lucky for me, he answered groggily on the second ring, rather than taking 10 like the previous day when I wanted him to help carry in groceries from the garage. NOT so lucky for me, as soon as I touched the red square with D for Dad (my phone contacts being set up by Genius) to call him, there was a sudden stoppage of the

CLICK CLICK RRRRR

Of course Hick didn't know what I was talking about. He told me to turn off T-Hoe, and he'd come get me if T-Hoe wouldn't start again. That went against every fiber of my being, because why would you turn off a running car, on the chance that it may not start again? Anyhoo...I did, and T-Hoe did, so Hick told me to drive home, and call back if I broke down. I guess he needed few more ZZZZZs.

I was sure to tell Hick my route, which was a bit of a detour, due to the low-water bridge being flooded from all that snow melting Tuesday, and rain overnight. Lucky for me, T-Hoe drove home like nothing had happened, still shining his CHECK ENGINE light, with the usual messages popping up alternately. Those being SERVICE SUSPENSION SYSTEM and SERVICE PARK ASSIST.

Hick came out to the garage wearing gloves and an orange hat with ear flaps, and proceeded to check my oil (about half a quart low, he said, which is what he sometimes calls me, if he doesn't agree with my opinions). Then he closed the hood, and said, "Who knows what it could have been."

Of course I suggested that perhaps he might fetch the gadget I gave him for Christmas that plugs into T-Hoe and reads the error that made the CHECK ENGINE light come on. It's a CHECK ENGINE checker! Which I got specifically because T-Hoe's CHECK ENGINE light keeps coming on, then going off after a couple days. Hick said it was over in the BARn, where no cars live, go figure!

We'll see what develops...