What swag can a high school senior get if he goes begging at each classroom door on the next-to-last day of school? This:
Here is a list of items in this picture, starting at the bottom left corner:
a bag of Valentine hearts
a plastic cup
a Tootsie Roll midgee
a fun size Butterfinger
a Halls mentholyptus cough drop
a tiny stack of Post-It note that look like an eraser
a mini Tootsie Pop
a cough drop
a peanut cluster that looks like a turd
two Starlight mints
a lunch money envelope
an attendance slip
a discipline form
a piece of sheet music for Gangnam Style
a hardback Catching Fire
Genius was most impressed with Catching Fire. He said the librarian was giving out books. No way. I said that would never happen. "No, Mom! She had a whole box of books to give away, and I picked this one!"
"It looks surprisingly like the one from our house, the one I pre-ordered when it first came out, before there was such a big to-do about The Hunger Games series. The one you loaned to several people, and we never got back."
"Yeah. The main reason I wanted it was because I can't find the one at home."
After preserving this moment for posterity, Genius raked in even more loot. I think I heard him mention a paper clip. I'm trying to conceal my envy.
Tom Sawyer never had it so good.