When The Pony started working at the post office, he was given a little kit of accoutrements to facilitate his delivery efficiency.
- nylon mail pouch for carrying the mail
- mail cap
- strap-on headlamp
- medium pump bottle of Purell hand sanitizer
- bright orange reflective vest for wear after dark
- bottle of pepper spray in case of dog attack
- gallon water jug (blue) with handle (not insulated, about the thickness of a Solo cup)
He was NOT issued a HazMat suit! Sure, you might not think he'd need such protective gear. Until maybe you've noticed the condition of those LLVs (Long Life Vehicles). No, The Pony was surviving just fine without a HazMat suit until last week.
"Oh, Mom. I've got another picture to show you. See what you think."
"I don't get it. Was it too big? Was it awkward?"
"Nooo... look at it!"
"I am. I even have my glasses on. But I don't know what's so special about it."
"It's LEAKING! That's what we do to packages that are leaking. Put them in a bag. I told my supervisor that I couldn't deliver it."
"What's in it?"
"I don't know. If I had to guess, I'd say maybe some kind of soap or shampoo or cleaner. So it's not THAT bad. Like the one a guy who's worked there a while told me about. Apparently, some guy used to mail a dead raccoon! With the guts and everything still in it! He did it TWICE! So it wasn't an accident!"
"Heh, heh. Like you could accidentally mail a dead raccoon carcass."
"They think maybe he was sending it to his ex. Because both times, it was going to the same address."
"Well. I was thinking maybe he was sending it to somebody who does taxidermy, or wants the skin or tail."
"No. We're pretty sure it was a REVENGE package!"
"So what do they do with those kind of packages?"
"They call or leave a note for the person it's addressed to, and tell them their package is leaking and can't be delivered, and see if they want to pick it up. That raccoon ruined a whole CART of mail! So they had to try and contact a lot of people. But sometimes they can't find an address, if the leakage makes the ink dissolve."
Good to know. In case my dead raccoon never arrives...
That guy must be responsible for my having to answer 40 questions to send a book yesterday.
ReplyDeleteI was tasked with mailing Genius three of his old cell phones! Up front, I informed the clerk that the package contained lithium batteries.
DeleteApparently, two cell phones are fine, three are debatable, and four are not permitted! She kept consulting a flip chart, muttering out loud that I couldn't mail them, then "guessing" that it would be okay. It would have been easier to mail a dripping, stinking, dead raccoon!
Being a postal worker has to be hard.
ReplyDeleteThe Pony is good with details, so the part about getting the mail sorted and to the right place is easy for him. I think his biggest concerns are loose unfriendly dogs, and breaking down in the LLV (Long Life Vehicle). He prefers a job without much personal interaction, so this fits him. I worry about him in bad weather, but he just puts on a warm water-proof coat and plows ahead.
DeleteLeaking packages are not something I ever thought about, since I never order anything that could leak.
ReplyDeleteI hope there wasn't a lot of important mail in the load that got ruined by a raccoon.
I'm wondering if it was just a cart full of packages, or if regular mail was in there too. I'll have to ask The Pony.
Deleteleaking packages should definitely not be delivered! Obviously, the receiver would not want to accept it and send it back to the sender.
ReplyDeleteSuch a conundrum! It shouldn't be delivered to the receiver, but can it be 'delivered' back to the sender?
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