Saturday, July 13, 2024

Misery Loves Company and Rumpuses

Thursday being my errand day, I was over in Sis-Town, pumping gas into T-Hoe at Casey's, when I heard my phone ring. It was on the console. I was just about to uncouple the gas nozzle, so I didn't rush to answer. I've been getting a lot of scam calls lately. I figured if it was important (or not) they'd leave a voicemail.

Imagine my panic when I got into the driver's seat, and saw that call was from The Pony. It was 4:18. So either The Pony was off work, or had encountered a calamity at the end of his route. I tried to call back. No answer. Then a voicemail came up. 

This was even more worrying! It was garbled. I could only make out a word here and there. More of a connection issue than a speech problem, it sounded like. So I was hoping it represented a lack of service, rather than The Pony slowly losing consciousness from a knock to the noggin in a fall or attack, or loss of blood from a canine chomp. Yes. I know. I'm entirely too invested in The Pony's work habits, job hazards, and minute-to-minute health!

I told myself this must be nothing. Yet the voicemail went on and on! A word or two here and there. Then all at once, "Huh? I didn't... HELLO! HELLO! Are you there?"

Of course I answered. Surely you don't think an electronics ignoramus like Val understands that you can't talk to a voicemail!

Then I got a text. "I buttdialed you I'm so sorry!"

"Okay. I was listening to a garbled voicemail."

"Yeah. Somehow you got dialed while I was talking to a co-worker and walking down the office stairs. I checked my phone when I got to the car, and it said I was having a two-minute conversation. So I cut it off."

You know the CCA that started when I did? And got let go, but got a job at another post office, and helps out here a lot now? Well, she got bitten by a dog! As in, she was on the phone with a manager when I came in. She got nipped on the ass! Is being stubborn like me and not wanting to go to a doctor, it sounded like. That's what I was talking to the other worker about."

"Oh no! Now she will have to take pictures of her rumpus!"

On our phone call Friday morning, The Pony said he had tried to text her that evening, but maybe she changed her number since leaving this office.

"Or maybe she was at the doctor, or dealing with paperwork, from the bite."

I guess that bitten worker had time to return The Pony's text before work, because around 7:30, The Pony sent me another text.

"I have now officially seen a coworker's ass. And I cringed in sympathetic pain, because that bite looks painful and is already hella bruised."

For some reason, that Queen song is playing in my head. You know, "Another One Bites the Butt."

8 comments:

  1. I can see how the call was concerning you. So, did he take a picture for her or did he just see the picture of her ass? Butt calls always concern me because I do think someone is trying to relay a problem. Too bad the workers cannot wear an electrified shield against dogs.

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    1. She sent The Pony a picture. I'm guessing it was a tight closeup, and not a titillating photo! They were close work friends, going to academy together, and starting out as CCAs. But not so close, I think, that she would allow The Pony to take a picture of her ass!

      If I had just heard the whole conversation, I would have figured out it was a butt-dial. The cutting in and out concerned me that something might be wrong.

      Obviously, the gal didn't see the dog coming at her rumpus, or she could have used her dog spray to deter it. Maybe they should wear a leather apron like meat-cutters!

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  2. Apparently she and Pony have an....uh....understanding if she sent him a picture of . . . .
    Oh, never mind. I thought it was interesting that Pony butt-dialed you to tell you about his friend's butt incident. Life as a postal employee sounds quite interesting unless you've made this all up.

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    1. Apparently, being friend-zoned has its perks! I can't make this stuff up. Such a coincidence of rumpuses.

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  3. Oh no! I hope the co-worker is okay and soon back at work, thoguh she might look for a different job where there won't be any dogs. maybe this will create a situation where known dog areas don't receive mail and have to come in to the post office to get it.

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    1. It's hard to give up a secure job with seniority and benefits. The Pony faces the same dilemma, and he's been bitten more times. The individual dog-bite homes already supposedly have to abide by this policy of picking up their mail. SUPPOSEDLY! Unless they sign something to keep their dogs put up during mail delivery hours. Then I guess the dog gets a second chance to bite, if they don't abide by that agreement.

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    2. Butt dial and a But pic. Ain't technology great!

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    3. According to The Pony, YES!

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