Monday, May 17, 2021

Surreptitious Hicknanigans

The rich tapestry of Val's life might be woven too tightly! It has begun to unravel.

I got a late start to town on Sunday. I blame Candy Crush Saga for giving me an hour of free exploding candies. I couldn't let them go to waste, now could I?

Hick in SilverRedO passed me headed home, as I was on the way to Save A Lot. We met at the literal place on the road where my mom ran over a dog. DON'T CRINGE! The dog was unhurt. It was a big dog, and she was not a fast driver. The Pony was with her, and of course this has now become the house where Grandma ran over a dog. HE WAS FINE! The dog AND The Pony. We saw him for years afterwards. Not even a limp. I think it was a glancing blow. Just enough to make a THUD, and make my mom take a quick inhale. It's not like she drove up in the yard! The dog ran into the road to chase her car.

Anyhoo... I didn't stop to chat with Hick, because a car was coming along behind him. It was nearly 3:00 as I crested the hill into Backroads. The hill with a right turn onto the street at Hick's Storage Unit Store, and a left turn onto a street that winds around to the elementary school. It's a dangerous intersection, because the hill is steep, and it's hard to see cars coming from the town side as you pull out.

THE ROAD WAS FULL OF BROKEN GLASS!

It was mostly on the side of the road coming OUT of town. Just a bit scattered in my lane. I tried to avoid it best I could, as I slowed from the legal speed limit of 45 to the in-town limit of 30. Huh. I wondered if that glass had been there when Hick left his Storage Unit Store. I hope he didn't drive through it! We just put new tires on T-Hoe and A-Cad. SilverRedO needs to keep on truckin' on his regular tires for a while.

I made a mental note NOT to come out of town that way. I'd have to drive right through all that glass. I'd take the roundabout route. The LITERAL roundabout route. It was all the rage years back, being the first roundabout in the county. The high school kids used to circle it just for fun.

In Save A Lot, a former student followed me up the pasta aisle to chat. She's on the police force now! In full uniform, looking sharp, even in a bullet-proof vest. Yes. She's been shot at. Anyhoo... I called Hick before starting home. He said he was going to meet a lady to pick up a display case. I cautioned him not to drive through the glass by his Storage Unit Store road.

"Oh. There's glass in the road?"

"Yeah. There must have been a wreck. People crash there all the time. Did you guys hear one? Or did it happened after you left, before I got there?"

"Uh... yeah. There was an accident. I was it."

"WHAT? You were in an accident?"

"No. Not exactly. I had a display case in the back of my truck. I drove all the way down past Bill-Paying town to get it. I was really careful loading it. I had it sitting in my truck while I was selling at my store. Then when I pulled out and made my left to come home, I heard something. The top slid off of it and broke! I just got out of there as fast as I could."

"That's not right! What about people who can't afford new tires, who are driving through it?"

"I don't know what you expect me to do, Val. I thought about going around the block and coming back to it, but what could I do? I don't have a push broom in my truck. It's right on top of the hill. Nobody could see me until they were right on me. I didn't want to get hit."

"I'm taking the roundabout to avoid that mess. I don't need my new tires going flat."

"It's not shards, is it? Didn't it break in little pieces, like safety glass? I'm sure it was safety glass."

"It's in small pieces, but there are SO MANY, all over that side of the road. I get rocks stuck in the tread of my new tires. I sure don't need glass fragments in there!"

"Well, they shouldn't be sharp. It's safety glass. I do feel bad, but I don't know what else I could have done."

"CALLED SOMEBODY, maybe? Crap! I could have told my police student! I didn't even think of it. And that's BEFORE I knew you were responsible! What if I'd told her, and then she found out it was you, and then she'd think I was covering up for you by saying I didn't know where it came from..."

Oh, what a tangled rich tapestry we unravel, when first we practice to avoid the gavel...

4 comments:

  1. hick, bad boys, bad boys whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do when Val's former student PO comes for you?

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    1. She was all decked out, too! Intimidating. I'm sure she had a taser. She's a former softball catcher, and sturdy. Hick wouldn't stand a chance in a tussle.

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  2. Maybe some ne'er do well will drive that way and see the glass sparkling in the sunlight and stop to pick up every piece because he thinks they are diamonds that fell out of a jewellery truck.

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    1. Oh my gosh! They DO look like diamonds! I went by today (Hick texted that the glass was off the road this morning) and saw the particles glittering on the grass at the edge of the road. I bet somebody stopped on that side road by them, or on the nearby parking lot of an abandoned shopping plaza, and got a good look.

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