Every day I learn something new! Or maybe I don't, because I'm suspicious by nature, and like to question authority. That doesn't mean I DEFY authority, of course. But I make authority SHOW ME before I let it reel me in like a stupid fish that bites a bare hook.
I am getting fed up with TV news that likes to PLANT A SUGGESTION by way of a question. Like asking a supposed expert: "Don't you think this means there will be a shortage of pork and chicken in the grocery stores?" So much for finding any meat on my next trip to town.
The most annoying event was Sunday evening, when I started reading about supposed studies that showed PEPCID to be a treatment for the VIRUS!
OH. MY. [FREAKIN'.] GOSH.
Sitting there in my dark basement lair, I could practically hear the muffled scraping sounds as millions of people wriggled their way out of their toilet paper castles, and headed for Walmart to strip the shelves of my beloved Equate Acid Reducer Complete. Darn you, hoarders! By Monday morning, it was on several cable news stations. Not even worth a trip to town to try and nab a bottle. Thank goodness I'd just opened a new bottle of 50 tablets the day before. Why can't the news report that creamed corn is an antidote? I don't begrudge anybody my share of creamed corn.
Furthermore, I cannot keep up with the symptoms! Every day, I hear a new one that convinces me I must have the dreaded VIRUS. So far, I run through my checklist each morning, once I wake up and ascertain that I'm still living.
Fever
Tiredness
Dry Cough
Shortness of Breath
Aches and Pains
Nasal Congestion
Runny Nose
Sore Throat
Diarrhea
Nausea
Loss of Appetite
Headaches
Confusion
Red Eyes
Fizzing Sensation on Skin
Testicular Pain
Rash
Red Lesions on Hands and Feet
Stroke
About the only symptoms I have truly ruled out are: testicular pain, and loss of appetite!
Oh, and now we hear that a TIGER has tested positive for the VIRUS, and a CAT, and a PUG! So stay six feet away from your pets, I guess. And tigers.
I'm thinking of adding an extra trip to town every week. I'm going stir-crazy.
I think with my confusion I am sure I have the virus.
ReplyDeleteSometimes I have to MAKE myself think!
DeleteYou left out loss of sense of smell.
ReplyDeleteMaybe if they listed sudden desire to hoard common produces as a symptom the problem would go away.
Bingo on the leading questions, why even bother asking the expert, just turn your question into a statement of fact, and show the expert nodding in the affirmative.
Well, that stinks! I DID forget it! Hoarding is a sickness all its own...
DeleteMake sure the expert has a bookcase behind him/her!
I couldn't agree with you more. The first thing I thought, when they announced they were shutting down various meat processing plants due to coronavirus, was everyone will now go out and hoard any meat they can. Better have a place to put it as I understand there is a shortage of freezers, due to parts that are made in China, needed for manufacture. This constant barrage of "news" is exhausting. I don't go looking for it. We quit watching the news on TV and I bypass as much as I can on my online newspaper and I still "hear" the crap that's going on day after day. I hope you don't have trouble finding more Pepsid when you next need to resupply - we can finally get t.tissue (limit 1 pkg per person) and paper towels, if you're lucky. Don't use many but still like to have a couple rolls on hand. Ranee (MN)
ReplyDeleteI mainly flip through the cable news shows while sitting in the La-Z-Boy every morning (sometimes that means noon) checking my blogs. I do it to see how much money I'm losing in the stock market.
DeleteThank goodness I just opened that (Walmart brand) Pepcid, and still have 40-something tablets left before I have to trade a truckload of toilet paper for them!
I can't listen any more. I figure if my testicles hurt, I'll know. Oh wait. He will know. Well you know!
ReplyDeleteIf that happens, there will probably be a TV crew six feet outside your door to interview you.
DeleteLucky for us, we have a prescription for the famotidine! So far my testicles have been fine, but I have every other symptom in the list!
ReplyDeleteShh! Don't TELL everybody you can get it! The line will be backed up from there to my front yard.
DeleteAdd diarrhea to your list? That could be tiresome.
ReplyDeleteI am with all the way except the scrotum problem and appetite mentioned. Did you mention homicidal leanings?
I HAVE diarrhea! On my LIST, I mean! I did omit homicidal leanings, but I'm pretty sure it's real.
DeleteThat's a scary list of symptoms. I have some of them, but that's related to my asthma and hayfever and the tiredness is because as soon as I go to bed around 11pm, several of the neighbours wake up and make a lot of noise opening and closing doors while they visit back and forth like they're not supposed to. I think my cat is safe, she never gets outside.
ReplyDeleteIt's to the point that almost any symptom seems to be related to the VIRUS! Now I'm reading that SMOKING seems to prevent people from catching it. I suppose we should all start smoking now...there go the hoarders, buying up all the cigarettes!
DeleteNot the smoking, but nicotine, so the patch may help.
DeleteOh, no! Now there will be a shortage of THE PATCH! I can imagine people sitting in their toilet paper castles, smoking while wearing the patch, gorging themselves on meat (which they eat by moving their face masks aside), then chewing Pepcid for good measure, after slathering hand sanitizer up to their elbows.
Delete