Friday, February 15, 2019

I Won't Go So Far as to Say I Made It Proud

Earlier this week, I was out and about on my birthday, and looked down to check the time. Not on T-Hoe's in-dash clock. That thing is 22 minutes fast. I've left it that way since I retired. My school clock was set ahead to facilitate dismissal times among the campuses, so T-Hoe ran on school time. Not-Heaven, NO! School time was not 22 minutes fast. It was about 5 minutes fast, which crept to 7 by the end of the year. I didn't bother to reset T-Hoe's clock for a year or two. Do you know how TECHNICAL that is? I just kept in mind how far ahead it was. Like now. I know it's 22 minutes. That doesn't mean I want to do mental math every time I check if I'm on schedule.

Sometimes I just glance down at my Shaming Bracelet. It's like a watch, you know. A watch that also beeps with chastisement if you're not moving enough to meet your day's goal. Which is set at TWICE what it should be, thanks to Genius at Christmas perhaps forgetting that I'm an old lady, and programming it for a random sedentary millennial with an office job and lazy bone.

Anyhoo... I glanced down at my Shaming Bracelet to check the time, and didn't see the time! What I saw instead was THIS:


Ignore the reflection of my phone taking the picture. And also my crepey wrist-skin. Or as The Pony would say, my creepy wrist-skin.

I'm pretty sure my Shaming Bracelet was NOT suggesting that I eat an emergency cupcake. I'm pretty sure my Shaming Bracelet was wishing me Happy Birthday.

That was even more heartwarming than earlier in the day, when the secretary from our financial advisor's office called to wish me a Happy Birthday. You'd think the insurance agent could have had his secretary call. It's not like it costs anything.

14 comments:

  1. It looks to me like you cupcake is 22 minutes fast!

    Happy Birthday.

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    1. I don't like to think that it makes me 22 minutes older than my real age!

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  2. Happy 39th, Val. (once again - heh, heh)

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    Replies
    1. It was, and continues to be, a very good year!

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    2. You're 39? I'm only 36 (& have been for a long time)!!


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    3. I'm sure you're not one of those young whippersnappers I complain about!

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  3. Always eat a cupcake, no matter what.

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  4. Your Birthday is Feb. 15th? So is my daughter's. I sent her a text message filled with icons of cakes, balloons and glasses of wine. today, 16th is my son's birthday, he got a similar message but with mugs of beer instead of the wineglasses.
    So Happy Birthday!! I'd send cake but it won't fit in the envelope...

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    1. I don't want to reveal the actual date of my birthday. We'll just say that The Pony's and mine fell within the work week. My boys only sent me a plain-text text by way of acknowledgement. Even if you could fit a cake in the envelope, that doesn't mean my post office would deliver it in a timely manner. Or at all.

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  5. Ha Ha, only a teacher can relate to car's school time clock. Mine was always five minutes ahead. Happy birthday, and I hope you ate a real cupcake. NOW I want a cupcake!

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    1. WAIT! I didn't have ANY cake for my birthday! I'll have to remedy that this weekend, when we go visit The Pony. I'm sure I can find a buffet with plenty of cake. Can you believe he didn't want us there on his actual 21st birthday weekend???

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  6. And a late Happy Birthday to you! My daughters celebrate the entire month of their birthdays. Their husbands participate in this lunacy and give them gifts all month long and they give each other silly gifts and then post it all on Facebook. Their mother, being of sound mind, wishes them well on the actual day (I remember it well). Long ago, we agreed that we would no longer exchange gifts. Now I feel cheated!!

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    1. Thanks! Your daughters are like a casino! All but one casino gives us our birthday $5 free play any time during our birthday month. We only get it once, but the day doesn't matter. The SCROOGE casino that won't do that makes you show up on your exact birthday. Every party has its pooper!

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