Hick had an appointment with his ophthalmologist on Thursday. He's known about it since his last appointment with his ophthalmologist. I just can't get enough of that word, can you? Ophthalmologist! Since I need to look up the spelling every time I use it, I'm going to make the most of my efforts.
Let the record show that Hick has no vision in his left eye, save gray shadows, due to a 14-year-old's error in judgment while setting off fireworks. He has regular appointments with his local ophthalmologist, because he has glaucoma in that eye, and when you only have one eye left, you don't want some run-of-the-mill optometrist who is not an ophthalmologist poking around in your peeper(s).
Anyhoo...Hick was scheduled to have a growth removed from the eyelid on his good eye. It's been affecting his vision for a couple of months. According to Hick, the ophthalmologist has done many such removals, right there in his office, where THREE ophthalmologists share the practice, and do a booming business in cataract surgery as well. Which takes 3 hours, according to Hick, who had taken my grandma there years ago for it.
"I've got an appointment on October 18th to get this thing took off my eye. He'll do it right there in the office, and said it takes about 20 minutes. I took the 8:05 appointment, since I figure he can't be backed up and behind when he first starts."
"Okay. Get me up early, and I'll drive you. You know. You drive over there, and I'll drive us back."
"I don't think you need to." Said Hick the man who drives himself home after having his eyes dilated.
"That's okay. I'm not doing anything. You might not feel like driving. I hope they don't put a patch on it!"
"Ya. That would be bad. Since I only have the one."
Hick's appointment was for 8:05. We got there at 7:50. By the time Hick checked in and sat down, I counted 13 people in that office. Another 8-10 trickled in while we waited. Sure, most of them were pairs like us. Husband/wife, mother/daughter, father/son. Still. That was a lot of people. Good thing the waiting room had over 40 chairs. The office gals started calling people back around 8:10, once the rush was over.
"Whoopsie! That's three people. For three doctors. Looks like everyone else must have an 8:00 appointment, and you took 8:05!"
"Looks like it."
"Probably, they're taking back the cataract people to get them ready, and he'll work on you between time."
"Maybe."
Hick was called back at 8:25. I'd brought some junk mail to read. You never know when you might want to order a butt-crack bank for your kids for Christmas. I perused the three catalogs, while people in the chairs across from me watched. I guess they could see me. Apparently they couldn't see well enough to pick up a magazine off the table to pass the time reading.
At 9:10, I finished my Christmas shopping, and stuffed the catalogs back in my purse. I was optimistic that Hick would be out any minute. At 9:20, I got a text.
"I'm waiting again. You can go on to the credit union if you want." [I was planning to deposit some money in two accounts while we were over there in bill-paying town.]
"How long? I don't want to walk all the way out, and back in." [The office is on a fairly steep hill, and Hick had parked around back. I avoided the steps and walked up the parking lot.]
"They haven't even gave me the anticeptic yet so don't know." [And also doesn't know the difference between anesthesia and antiseptic, and Autocorrect had forsaken him.]
"They haven't done ANYTHING? And the procedure takes 20 minutes?"
"They checked my pressure and looked at it and he told her what to do to get me ready but haven't started yet."
"I'll go to the credit union. You can sit out here and wait if you get done and I'm not back."
So I drove across town to use Sonic's bathroom. Then I went to the credit union, where a January molasses teller took my deposits. I was getting worried that Hick would be waiting out front for me. A mail JEEP made the light ahead of me, and was making stops. I passed him in the center turn lane, and upon looking in my mirror to get back over, I got a great view of a fluffy cloud and blue, blue sky...but no mail JEEP. Darn that Hick for changing T-Hoe's settings!
When I got back to the office, Hick was NOT out front. But my parking place in the next-to-last row was still available! I went in and had to pick my seat again (heh, heh) because somebody had taken my place. Just like that face-washing lovemaker in the "Cecilia" song by Simon and Garfunkel.
It was now 10:00 a.m. I was sure that Hick would be right out...
TO BE CONTINUED on Sunday...
(with possible pennies on the horizon for Saturday CENTSus)
To BE Continued? What is this, "Deal or no Deal."
ReplyDeleteCataract surgery in New Jersey is about 30 minutes.
I didn't want to put my handful of readers into a coma by doing the whole thing at once!
DeleteThe actual procedure here might also be 30 minutes! I swear these OPTHALMOLOGISTS must charge by the hour. One couple in the waiting room was arguing over who got up earlier at 5:00 a.m. or 5:10. They get you there early to sit and wait, I guess. People travel a long way for this office.
Can we be confident the ophthalmologist knows the difference between anesthetic and antiseptic?
ReplyDeleteWhat do you know about cataract surgery? I thought a film was removed from across the eye, but a neighbour tells me the lens at the back of the pupil is removed and replaced with something artificial, which sounds rather awful to me.
I'm more confident that the ophthalmologist knows the difference than I am that Hick does.
DeleteI know nothing about cataract surgery. I also thought the film was removed. However...a loop video was playing above the coffee station at that office, about a single procedure to remove a cataract and improve your vision so glasses may not be needed anymore. It seemed like a new lens was being installed. I'm guessing it works something like a permanent contact. I wasn't really paying attention.