Sometimes, people can be overly familiar. Take it from Val, the original (and high-powered) weirdo magnet.
Monday was Walmart day, and the checker kind of overstepped her bounds, IMO. Sure, the policy is to ask a customer if they found everything okay, or comment on some item to make small talk. I'm used to that intrusion. In fact, this checker asked me if I found everything okay, and I said, "Yes, I did." Figuring that would put an end to the chit-chat, so The Inquisitor could go on with her duties of ringing up my items and getting me out of there.
As with most things in Val's life these days...my check-out experience did not go as planned.
"Oh, is this good?" The Inquisitor held up a Blue Bunny Load'd Sundae. An individual ice cream treat, this one being Chocolate Brownie Bomb.
"Yes. I only found them last week. They're delicious."
The Inquisitor spun my Blue Bunny around, looked at it from every angle. If she'd had one of those flat wooden spoons, I daresay she would have popped off the top to sample it.
"Don't look at the calories!"
Seriously. I wanted to tell that old gal, "Oh, I don't care about the calories! Next time, I'm going to get one of each flavor, and eat them one after the other!" But I didn't.
I'm glad I wasn't buying Preparation H.
Tuesday, I was in line at the Gas Station Chicken Store. Buying only my 44 oz Diet Coke, and a single $5 scratcher (loser, keeping my recent streak alive). I was next. Standing right there at the glass-top counter where the scratchers are kept, a box of impulse purchase items to my left.
A dude came in and got in line next to me. He looked at those impulse items, which this week happen to be individual slices of Hostess Iced Lemon Cake.
Dude pulled up his gray t-shirt to expose his belly. He rubbed it. There might or might not have been some bullet hole scars there. I was trying not to stare.
"They always get sumpin' to temp us fat people!"
Um. Yeah. Thanks so much. It's a wonder I can fit through the door, I guess.
Do you think it was just a trick to see if I'd pull up my shirt? That he was flirting with me, and wanted to roll off into the sunset with me in his heavy-duty truck?