Thursday, December 30, 2021

What Do You Give a Genius Who Has Everything

I didn't give gifts this Christmas. Hick said he didn't need anything. The boys are grown. The Pony will get a few items for Pony House when he moves in. With Genius living in Pittsburgh, it's a hassle to send gifts. Last year they didn't all arrive on time. This year, with Genius only coming for a one-day visit, we didn't have the time to open gifts, and force him to load them up and drive them across the country. So we gave cash.

Seriously. Who WOULDN'T like a gift of cash? One size fits all. You can customize it for what you want. Besides, we were taking a gambling trip to our local casino. You can't feel guilty losing money that hasn't been earned by the sweat of your brow.

Well. Who knew that giving Genius cash would be such a hardship? Not this old Val!

As we were parting ways at the casino, Genius and Friend having followed us down so they could take the highway back, and not meander down our two-lane curvy blacktop to retrieve Genius's Honda CRV... Genius had a request.

"Mom. Do you think you could write me a check? For this money that I didn't gamble?"

"Oh! I don't bring the checkbook when we come to the casino. It's home in my other purse."

"Okay. There's no hurry. It's just that neither one of us has a physical bank. We only do online banking. I don't know what to do with this cash." He looked at Friend. "I guess maybe you could spend it when you buy the groceries..."

"I can write you a check and send it in your letter. I can send it tomorrow."

"That would be good. Like I said, there's no hurry. But we don't carry cash."

"Yeah. We didn't even have a coin to scratch the lottery tickets my parents gave us for Christmas," said Friend. "My grandpa had to toss us a quarter! I think I still have it. We'll have to share it to scratch the tickets YOU gave us!"

Heh, heh. You'd think I had given Genius a suckling pig that Friend would have to take to market under his arm, squealing all the way, to trade for a slab of fatback and an earthenware jug of whiskey! 

At least The Pony will spend cash on a snack at Casey's when he darts in for a bathroom break during work. I know that, because he always uses a twenty, and the living room coffee table is covered with tens and fives and ones from his pocket at the end of the day.

I can't believe this generation is so anti-cash! But at least they can still read cursive! They were a couple years before that stopped being taught in elementary school.

14 comments:

  1. I remember about 10 years ago, there was a terrible storm come through and powerlines were down. People were mad they couldn't use credit/debit cards. Since then we have kept a secret cash stash at home.

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    1. We always keep a stash of cash in one of our three safes. Just because we like cash! No surprise bills when you pay as you go. It seems like real money when you use real money!

      We do use a debit card for convenience. And a single credit card paid off each month for online and Pony House purchases. Except NOW Hick decided he needs a Lowe's credit card to get 5% off or some such bargain.

      During the Great Icepocalypse of '06, we had that problem around here. But it wasn't OUR problem, heh, heh. Also a good thing Hick had filled up the gas tanks of the vehicles and tractor, since no gas could be pumped.

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    2. Hick needs to check on that 5% off in case it is just a "honeymoon" offer, for the first purchase or the first month or for the first $500 or whatever. or maybe only on specified items.

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    3. I'm pretty sure the discount it there at the bottom of the receipts. I have such a collection of receipts now that I don't look that closely at all of the them!

      Lowe's has the discount on the credit card, and Menards had a rebate that was well worth sending in the bottom portion of the receipt with a rebate form. Hick has probably gotten back around $300 in store credit with the rebates.

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  2. Cursive? Oh, you mean script or longhand. I am way too old to understand not using cash, most places around here still take cash.

    I send my kids cash because they take forever to deposit checks and I have to do math in my head every time I figure what is left in my checking account.

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    1. Maybe that's shop talk. We teachers always called it CURSIVE.

      Cash spends just fine at Hick's Storage Unit Store. But Country Mart frowns upon it like having sex with the cleaning woman on an office desk!

      Another "way too old" clue: you BALANCE YOUR CHECKING ACCOUNT! Genius and The Pony think I'm crazy for doing that. "Um. Mom. It's right there online on your statement."

      I don't trust a bank to do my balancing. Since one time they charged me for the same check TWICE. A complaint led to an investigation, in which fraud was discovered, but they would not disclose the details. It was only a $30-something check, but imagine if somebody did that to 100,000 accounts!

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    2. I don't balance my checkbook either, but when I send Christmas checks to the kids, I have make a mental note of the ones not cashed so I can subtract from the bottom line. I must be older than you, we used to call it script or longhand before cursive. Kind of like pound sign and hashtag.

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    3. WHAT? Old people are supposed to balance their checkbook! I at least do it once a month.

      I know what a pound sign is. And how to DIAL 1 before the area code for long distance! The workers at my bank apparently do not, and think both of their FAX machines are broken.

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  3. You gave him cash and he asked for a cheque? Is that instead of the cash or as well as the cash? And why can't he just accept and use the cash this one time and ask for a cheque next Christmas?

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    1. I gave him cash to get something he wants as a gift, or to spend at the casino we went to. He barely lost any money, and asked to trade that stack of cash for a check. If he had been in Pittsburgh this Christmas instead of visiting home, I'd have mailed him a check.

      Genius does all his buying with plastic or over the internets! He takes a picture of the check to deposit it in his online bank account. Funny how his original account was locked up for over a week when his bank was bought out by another bank, and he did not have access to his funds. Yet he STILL puts all his eggs in that one basket...

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  4. You know, my banks both are more online than in person BUT we can use the ATMs of other in person banks (like I can go to CIBC or Scotia Bank to use the machines) I am surprised his does not have that option! But like him, I only do cards BUT I can see the benefit of having some around just in case (I never have it but I see the good aspects LOL)

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    1. I don't know if putting money INTO an ATM is an option that Genius thought about. Or if he can get money out of one. Obviously, Genius doesn't want MONEY money. Only the pretend kind. He acted like those bills were a crate of chickens he'd have to haul around to barter with!

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    2. If we use ATMs here from another bank we get charged a fee for that. From our own bank, there is no fee, so I make sure to always use an ATM with my bank logo on it. There are some ATMs around that take cards from multiple banks, but I don't like those, they still charge a fee which shows up on your statement.

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    3. That's right, there IS a fee for other ATMs. I don't even use the ATM on the back wall of my bank any more, since it shorted me $20 one time. Of course the workers inside said they couldn't do anything about it. Even though you KNOW their amounts would not have balanced. They could have taken my name and given it to me the next day. Or credited it back to my account.

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