He Didn't Even Lick My Hand in Thanks

We've gotten rid of all our Thanksgiving leftovers except the Oreo Cake that I made for The Pony. It's been a bone of contention. I don't like Oreo Cake, and never eat it. That cake is The Pony's favorite. He volunteered to make it for himself, since I had all the other food to prepare, but that would have been a dirty trick, to make the only working member of our household, at 79 hours per week, stand and bake his own cake. So I made it the Wednesday before Thanksgiving.

Let the record show that I also bought a cheesecake selection, with 12 pieces and 6 different kinds. As The Pony quickly deduced, "We each get 4 pieces." Well. In a perfect world. Not in THIS house. I ended up with only 2 slices of cheesecake. But that's okay. I prefer the savory leftovers.

Anyhoo... on Friday morning, the day after Thanksgiving, I noticed that Oreo Cake, on the counter, snug in its opaque Tupperware cake holder. It looked like half the cake was gone! I didn't bother to lift the lid, because I don't even like that cake. I figured maybe The Pony had eaten some for breakfast, before he left for work. Yet when The Pony got home, and went to have some cake, he exclaimed in horror:

"THE CAKE IS HALF GONE!"

I was on the short couch, and turned to Hick to start an emergency session of This Is the Time of Day When We Talk About the Most Recent Thing You've Done Wrong.

"Did you eat The Pony's cake??? It's half gone!"

"I had two slices."

"I bought the cheesecake for YOU! I know you had a piece of cake when I was still eating Thanksgiving dinner. Did you have MORE cake that night?"

"I told you, I didn't eat all the cake. I had two slices."

"THAT MEANS NOTHING! They could have been HUGE slices!"

"I ate two pieces, Mom. After Thanksgiving dinner, and that night."

"But you're surprised that so much cake is gone! So obviously your dad ate a lot of cake!"

That issue was not resolved. But Hick stopped eating the Oreo Cake. I know this, because he peevishly said midweek, "I ain't touched that Oreo Cake! Not since you'uns made such a big deal about it."

Oh, don't feel sorry for Hick. He's not supposed to have sweets anyway. Plus he had the cheesecake, and cookies that he bought at the auction, and mini ice cream cups, and a couple individual pecan and pumpkin pies, and a Hostess-like pumpkin fried-pie thingy in a box. 

Anyhoo... I was meaning to wash up the big containers from our turkey/noodle/pea/

mushroom dish, and some large bowls that I forget what I'd made in them. But I forgot the cake holder, because The Pony was at work. Sunday morning, I asked if he was done with the Oreo Cake.

"Yeah. I kept thinking I'd have another piece, but I was tired. It's probably too dried out on the cut sides for me now."

"Okay. Because I need to wash that container. That cake WILL mold if left too long."

"I know. Remember my first year of college, when you made me Oreo Cupcakes? I forgot all about them. Then when I was moving to my apartment in May, I found three of them left in the container. Let's just say that I scoured it!"

"You should have thrown it away!"

"But it was a metal pan! I think I later made brownies in it."

"I hope I brought those for Easter. Not Thanksgiving!"

Anyhoo... The Pony went back to his room, and I got the cake ready for the dogs. I can't just toss a piece into Juno's house, where she prefers to receive her snacks, because the cake would get pieces of cedar shavings, and twigs, and all kinds of crumbly stuff stuck to it. And Jack would be sure to flip his over on the porch boards, and make a greasy icing stain. So I put a piece for each dog on a paper plate. I didn't want to overdo it. There was still some cake left. So I put it on a paper plate, and put that on the bottom shelf of FRIG II. I figured Hick might want it. If not, the dogs could have it the next day.

The Pony saw the cake when he was standing in front of FRIG II, gathering 20 spices to make himself chicken tacos.

"Oh, I guess the cake wasn't as stale as you thought?"

"I gave it to the dogs, but I already told Dad by text that he can have that. But if YOU want it, go ahead."

"No. I don't want it."

Hick sure did! He didn't care one whit that it was DOG CAKE. After supper, he grabbed a little mini vanilla ice cream cup, and that slice of cake. Then proceeded to sit down in his recliner and eat the ice cream right out of that individual cup until it was all gone.

"Um. I think the point of having cake and ice cream is to have a little bite of each. Maybe put the ice cream ON the cake."

"That takes too long."

Even ice cream can't come between Hick and his dog cake.