Sunday, September 8, 2019

Val, Rogue Light Bulb User

You know how Hick gets that attitude? I know he does it with The Pony. Not so much with Genius, I think. But how he kind of chuckles, and acts like you’re a complete idiot, when you are saying the most true and sensible thing in the world, and he’s just making stuff up as he goes along?

“Why are so many lights burning out? They never used to do that.”

“Val. They’re not meant to be on ten hours a day!”

“WHAT? You’re crazy! Of course they’re meant to be on. They’re light bulbs!”

“Normal people don’t do that.”

“You are so full of it! So you’re saying that people walk around in the dark, to spare their light bulbs?”

“No. But they don’t leave them on!”

“Say a person gets home from work around 4:30 or 5:00. They turn on the lights in their house, and get supper, and do homework with the kids, and watch TV, and one of them probably stays up until at least midnight, or maybe longer. You’re saying they don’t have the lights on during that time?”

“No. They don’t. They turn them off when they leave the room, and then turn them back on when they come back.”

“That’s bull! People leave their lights on when they’re home!”

“No, they don’t. They’re not like you!”

“I turn those lights on around 2:00 or 3:00 when I go downstairs. At 10:00 or 11:00, I got out and turn them off and turn on the lamps. That is NOT having the lights on too long! It’s NORMAL!”

“No, it isn’t. Say you run them nine hours a day, seven days a week… that’s 72 hours a week! In ten weeks, that’s 720 hours! A normal light bulb only lasts so long. Here. I’ll look it up. 750 hours! So in three months, that light will burn out.”

“They don’t burn out near that often! You can’t blame this on me! I’m using lights like a normal person.”

“Here. Let me look again. ‘A normal light bulb will last between 750 and 2000 hours.’ See?”

“Well, that’s quite a difference! So my light usage might give me almost SEVEN MONTHS of light! That seems more like it. Like they burn out once or twice a year.”

“There is nothing normal about leaving lights on all the time.”

“It’s not all the time! It’s a normal day’s usage! I hate it when you get like this. You are NOT King of the World. You don’t know everything. Stop trying to say I’m using the lights wrong and making them burn out. They burn out, and need replacing. Two of them have been out for over a month.”

“Well, I guess I’ll go to town and get some light bulbs.”

“You mean you don’t even have any spares?”


“No.”

That man argues more than Genius as a toddler! He used to replace (have Genius replace) a bulb when it burned out. So it didn’t seem like it was happening all the time. Now he just lets things go, and tries to make it my fault! I suppose it’s normal for a person to leave air conditioning and heat on in their BARn, even when they’re only in it a couple hours a week. Right? THAT’S normal…

Yeah, he must have felt guilty, because he went to town and bought light bulbs. Of course he didn’t go when I complained that one light was out. Not even when two lights were out. I guess I shamed him by stating haughtily that it doesn’t do much good to even turn on the lights, with only TWO of the FIVE working. He said “Yeah, I noticed that.” Yet he’d made no effort to replace them! Oh, but there’s more!

Hick put in new light bulbs. He got LED lights. I feel like I’m living on the surface of the sun. I think the light is actually coming THOUGH the wall of my office. I need eclipse glasses when I go out. I could rent out the basement as a surgical suite. The doctors would not need those pull-down lights. If a spider wanders out from under something, it will need eight tiny eyepatches and eight tiny white canes. I’m shocked that the floor tiles don’t start to smolder from the intensity of the lumens. Hick will probably need to close the bedroom door to sleep, until I turn off the basement lights and turn on my lamps.

In other news, Jack came running along the back of the garage, as I was on the back porch talking to Hick, who was standing by his fish pond, staining the slats of the side porch. Little Jack! I knew he heard my voice, and was running over to see me. Nope. He jumped into the fish pond and paddled around.

"Ooh! He's in that green water!"


"It won't hurt him. He's a dog. He does it all the time."

"You used to fill up a little dishpan pool for him to lay in. You know how he loves the water!"

"He's fine."

"He's coughing. He probably inhaled too much algae. You need to take better care of that fish pond."

"He's FINE! All the dogs drink out of it.

Then Jack got out of the fish pond and shook green water all over Hick. Heh, heh.

16 comments:

  1. Men always find an excuse to blame others when they don;t want to do a chore. Mine is the same way. Some algae can kill dogs.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hick and The Pony are quite alike in that matter. They'd rather spend an hour "explaining" why the chore is not necessary, rather than take five minutes to do it.

      Jack hopped in the fake fish pond, lapped up a drink, then coughed and sputtered. That pond has a pump, but I don't think it's been running for at least a year. No fish anymore, our cats gradually scooped them out and ate them!

      Delete
  2. Mrs C has lights on a timer. They go on around 5 pm and off around 2 am everyday. It does not seem like they burn out very often.

    I think it is tougher on the bulb to turn on and off often, then to stay on for a longer time.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aha! I KNEW other people used lights in a normal manner! Seems like a light doesn't just go out randomly, but when you flick it on, it does that sizzle sound and goes out.

      Delete
  3. OMG eight eye patches and eight tiny white canes. You are a hoot. We replaced our old kitchen ceiling light with an LED. It is blinding! People do not heat or cool the outside OR leave lights burning throughout the house. You tell Hick to take a survey.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The kitchen is where I NEED an LED. I have a ceiling light over the cutting block that holds three bulbs. It seems like only one is operational, and it's about 30 watts. I have fluorescents under the cabinets, but when I'm in no-Val's-land walking from FRIG II to sink, trying to read dates or ingredients or instructions, I almost need a flashlight.

      Hick won't take a survey, because that could disprove his theory.

      Delete
    2. 30 watts?? How do you even see anything at all in such a dim light? That's like someone holding a torch for you, but half a mile away. I have LEDs everywhere now. The one thing I miss having is a downlight over the sink, we had one in a house we built years ago because I specifically requested it, but they're not a common thing and I'm always washing dishes in my own shadow.

      Delete
    3. I do most of my prep at the counter, so those fluorescent lights allow me to see what I'm doing. The kitchen is bright during the day, no lights needed. In the winter, when it's dark at 5:00, I feel like I'm working in a mine, without even a carbide lamp for illumination!

      I DO have 2 lights over the sink counter! I forgot about them. They are standard brightness, and help with my dishwashing chores. That's the only time I turn them on.

      Delete
  4. I personally don't know any people who come home and turn all the lights on and leave them on. We'll turn on a light in the room we're using and turn it off when we leave the room. Electricity ain't cheap in this part of the world! My other issue is with the life span of light bulbs being nowhere near as long as it used to be. When the kids were little we'd get about five years from a light bulb. Now I'm changing bulbs at least once a year. I've switched to LED too, they're supposed to be cheaper to run and give more light, but that depends on how many lumens there are per bulb. I put a 400 lumen one on my TV watching lamp and it was too warm, felt like a sunlamp, so I bought a 200 lumen and put the other one away for a spare. I like bright light though, so the ceiling lights are whatever lumen is equivalent to about 100 watts. I don't have them on much, the kitchen one more than others because there's no point (or space) in having lamps in the kitchen.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, no! You've given VALidity to Hick's theory! I'll have to declare you an outlier in the statistics. Such facts do not support my agenda!

      Delete
    2. It is wasteful having unnecessary lights on, here in Aus the cost of electricity is enough deterrent to have people switching off.

      Delete
    3. I confess to not flipping lights off and on as I travel from room to room.

      Hick acts like I don't need the lights, but it is dark in a basement with no windows. So when I leave my lair and the glow of New Delly's monitor, I'd have to go diagonally across the basement to get to the light switch. It's not right outside my door.

      When I'm in the basement, those lights are on, until I go to sit in my OPC for TV, at which time I sometimes turn only a lamp on, or sometimes just watch in the glow of the screen.

      Upstairs, the living room flows into the kitchen, and we're back and forth from there, or to the bathroom. So we don't turn off the light for those short trips. I DO turn off the living room lights when Hick is gone to the auction several nights a week, since once I get my supper, I'm back downstairs anyway. I'm SHOCKED that he leaves them on!

      Delete
  5. Replies
    1. Heh, heh! I totally missed that! I guess Hick has been gaslighting me so long into believing he's good with numbers that I didn't even question it. Such a missed opportunity to serve him some comeuppance!

      Delete
  6. I am one who flips off that light as I leave a room. Brought up that way and old habits are hard to break. I get annoyed with people who leave the bathroom lights on all night.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I would wear out so many switches that way! I'm always going to one room and then going right back. I'll turn on the one in the new room, then turn it off as I leave. But the main room I leave on.

      I confess to leaving on the bathroom light IN A HOTEL, or I would have knocked off all ten toes by now.

      Delete