The Poparm Who Cried Loud Music

Poor Hick. He just can't catch a break. And even if he did manage to catch a break, accidentally, like if it took a good bounce and ended up in his arms...somebody would run up from behind, and pop it loose and take off with it. Poor Hick.

Yesterday morning, he set the alarm for 5:30, so he could arise early, and get to his scheduled MRI procedure for his Poparm. He had the 7:30 slot, and it takes about 25 minutes to get there. I suppose he was treating himself to breakfast on the way.

Now that we don't have two insurances, we have to pay the deductible. So rather than have his doctor send him to the local hospital for his MRI, he chose the closest MRI facility. The doctor (you know we're really talking about a nurse practitioner, right?) set it up for him when he was in the office for his weekly shot. He could hear the person at the other end of the call. Perhaps out the opposite ear of the doctor.

"They said it would cost $450, and that I should be ready to pay. But that they'd take $100. But that if I didn't have that, I could pay them $50 on the day of the test. How do you want me to pay?"

"Just put the whole thing on the debit card. Then we'll know it's gone. Don't be charging it like those $1000 shoe inserts from The Good Feet Store."

"Okay. What if the debit card won't work?"

"Then pay them cash. I know you have that much with you from your Storage Unit Store. I'll pay you back later."

So everything was arranged. Or so we thought. I was snoozing peacefully when Hick left. He returned home around 9:00, and plopped down on the bed to chat about his plans for the rest of the day, and let it slip, almost as an afterthought, that he had NOT had his MRI at 7:30.

"They had my arm all strapped up, and put me in, and at 7:40, they pulled me back out. The machine wasn't working. They had to call Siemans to get it fixed. I said, 'Good luck with that! I've had to call Siemans plenty of times, and they'll get to it when they get to it.' So now I have to reschedule."

"You mean you were already inside, and it didn't work?"

"Yeah. They had a whole waiting room full of people, too. So everyone had to leave."

"Imagine if you were working, and had taken time off. Like what if you were an hourly worker, and lost your wages? And drove in from a couple hours out in the middle of nowhere?"

"I know. But machines break. I know all about that."

Anyhoo...Hick decided to drive to the city to see a dealer about his rings that he found in his 18 storage units. More on this situation another day.

While he was in the city, he got a call from the MRI facility saying they could fit him in at 11:00. Hick said he couldn't make it back by then. So he scheduled it for 3:45 today. This morning, he planned on helping a buddy take the bed off his pickup truck, using his tractor scoop. The guy is converting his vehicle to a flat-bed truck. He was supposed to be here at 10:30. Around 9:00, Hick got a call saying that the MRI people could fit him in at 10:30. Hick said he already had plans, and that he'd stick to the 3:45 slot.

I'm hoping everything goes as planned. Though Hick DID say that yesterday, his arm was cramping after 10 minutes, and it was tied down, and he didn't know what he'd do if it went into a spasm. And that the lady told him she'd start the music in his headphones once he was in the machine, and that it was so loud he thought he'd go deaf, so he had to hit the call button, and the guy ran in to see what was wrong, and Hick told him the music was too loud.

I hope they don't think of Hick as The Poparm Who Cried Loud Music, just in case he really does have a problem with his arm. He says the MRI will take 45 minutes.

That's $10 per minute, you know. I hope he gets his money's worth today. And doesn't buy another lottery ticket on the way home, because it's pretty clear that he's never going to win anything.