Hick has a new item at his Storage Unit Store. Not so much a NEW item, as a DIFFERENT item. That is in fact pretty old. Uh huh. Hick does not live by gun sales alone. He has branched out into...are you ready for this...hold onto your (hopefully not-smelly hat)...
That's what Hick calls them, anyway, although I don't consider some of them to be actual doilies. A few look more like embroidered handkerchiefs. Or table runners.
Anyhoo...Hick has been sorting through his original hoard of the 18 storage units he bought, and found some doilies. They were not in sellable condition, so Hick brought them to the house to put in MY washing machine, using MY Tide, and OUR well water and OUR electricity. I really think I need to write up a pro-rated bill for his business expenses.
Oh, yeah. Hick also used MY dryer. I know. I was shocked, too. When I yelled upstairs to him, "You didn't put those doilies in the dryer, did you?" Hick affirmed that he had already done so. HE says they came out just fine. I would not have recommended it. In my mind, doilies are lacy and fragile and need at least to be hung to dry, if not hand-washed.
I might run a load of plain, detergented water through my washer before putting my clothes in there. We left home at 9:30 that morning, and Hick had put his doilies in the washer to simmer. When we returned at 4:00, he said, "The water's all brown! I'm going to run them through another load!"
Hick has a customer who LOVES doilies. He's going to sell her a box of them for $20. She'll be getting a bargain, and Hick only has $5 in that batch.
We were away on a surprise casino trip while Hick was doily-laundering. Of course we had to stop by Goodwill, where Hick bought a big bag of DOILIES! He said they were in good hygienic shape, and did not need to be washed before he could make money off them. Let the record show that Hick left the car running for me, with the radio on.