Sunday, December 27, 2020

Val Is a Victim of the Good-Ol'-Boy Network

Of course! ONE DAY after I declared a downtick of local ne'er-do-welling in my comments, I was slapped in the face by ne'er-do-wells in the very act of never doing well! In fact, a mere 16 hours had lapsed. It was almost as if Even Steven was all-knowing, and tipped off the ne'er-do-wells as soon as I left for town.

When I returned around 3:45 on Saturday afternoon, I crested the hill in front of our newest 10 acres, next to the BARn field, and saw two vehicles parked in our front yard! Not the front yard proper, next to the house. But the front yard/field by the end of the driveway, next to the sinkhole closest to the gravel road.


You don't want to come home and surprise strangers in your yard/field! It was a minivan the color of metallic sea-mist green/gray/blue. Not quite describable. It was about three car-lengths into the field, next to the trees that surround the sinkhole. In front of the minivan was a Gator-type ORV, dark green or black, a four-seater, with an orange triangle on the back warning traffic to look out for it, and it was HOOKED TO A TRAILER like Hick's car-hauling trailer!

Seriously! What business could these two vehicles possibly have on my property? 

As I turned T-Hoe in the driveway, I slowed. The minivan driver hopped in and started his vehicle. The driver of the Gator-thing turned to look at me. A look that said, "WHAT?" As if he belonged there! Not a challenging, smart-@$$ look. Just one that implied I was out of place for staring.
It crossed my mind to steer over there and ask them WHAT IN THE NOT-HEAVEN ARE YOU DOING ON MY PROPERTY?

Then my mind reminded me that I am an old lady with stove-up knees, not good at running, not good at fighting, and not packing heat. I doubt my sharp tongue would be protection enough in a rumble.

I stopped T-Hoe midway down the driveway. I called Hick, who is slow to answer.

"Why are two men parked beside our sinkhole?"

You know, because Hick has some questionable acquaintances, and more than once, more that twice, he's had oddballs out here to help him with something, or has given them permission to borrow the tractor or pick up equipment while he's not home.

"I don't know what two men are doing by our sinkhole! How would I know? I'm in town, at my buddy's auction."

"Well. Sometimes you let people come out here to get something, and you don't tell me."

"No. I didn't tell nobody they could come out. What are they doing?"

"I don't know! One has a trailer like yours hooked up to his Gator-thing, and it's empty! So I hope he didn't steal your trailer. OR I hope he's not throwing stuff down our sinkhole!"

"I'm on my way. Leaving now."

"Well, they just left when I stopped to look at them. I couldn't see where they went while I was talking. They were behind me. Now they're both gone. It was a green/silver/blue minivan, and a dark colored 4-door Gator-thing with an orange triangle, hooked to a trailer. The driver was wearing a red plaid shirt, and had a long gray beard, like Santa Claus. He was a little chubby. I'm going to drive around to see if I see those vehicles anywhere out the back entrance."

I did, and I did not. No vehicles like that were parked or in motion on the back two-mile stretch of gravel road. I figured if they left by the mailbox way, Hick would encounter them on his way home. OR they may have gone in deeper in the compound, up the gravel road past our house, and Hick could drive around on his Gator and look for them.

When I got back home, Hick was parked in SilverRedO up by the sinkhole. He started down the driveway as I was walking from garage to porch. THEN he disappeared. The Pony heard my tale, and went out on the porch to look for Hick. He saw SilverRedO over at the BARn, then Hick get in and start toward the house. About 5 minutes later, he came in the kitchen door.

"What's going on? Did they dump something in our sinkhole? Did you see them along the road?"

"I'm coming in to tell you. Settle down."

"I want to know why two strangers were parked in our yard walking around our sinkhole. Do you know anybody out here that looks like that?"

"I went to look in the sinkhole, and didn't see anything. I saw their tracks. When I was coming back from the BARn, Dog-Groomer's Husband called me. He said he had some broken-up concrete, and he put it down our sinkhole--"

"WHAT? How is that something people would think is OKAY? I don't want somebody's trash going down our sinkhole! It will get in the groundwater! I don't want YOU throwing OUR trash down the sinkhole! He only called you because I caught him doing it! And he wanted to let you know before I TOLD ON HIM! Did you ever give him permission to throw stuff down our sinkhole?"


"Did he ask if he could do it?"

"No. That kind of bothers me. But he DID say he did it, and that he had Jimbo helping him. So that's the van you saw."

"Who's Jimbo?"

"The kid who lives up at the log house."


"Yeah. But he wasn't living there then."

"See? They could have thrown ANYTHING down our sinkhole, and just TOLD you it was concrete! A headless body... a HEAD... evidence of some crime... I don't want people thinking it's okay to throw stuff down our sinkhole!"

"Oh, Val. He just put concrete in there."

So now I'M the hysterical woman who doesn't understand that sometimes, guys just need to drive onto someone else's property, and unload a trailer full of SOMETHING, to dispose of down their sinkhole, which is perfectly fine if you call and tell the property-owner after the fact.

What is YOUR verdict, O Great Internet Jury? Am I overreacting?


  1. No you are not overreacting! You tell them to stay on their own forty acres. Is this where Walter Scott was dumped down a well?
    Well! Even if not, put a sign up that says Live Gators. Never mind. That my encourage them.

    1. Nope. This guy's talent was tattooing, not singing. It was the heinous murder of Sam "Tick" Francis, in 2012/2013, by meth traffickers over a debt. Technically, his body wasn't found headless. The head was there in the septic tank with him. Just not attached, and wrapped in tape. I don't know if that part was reported, but that's the scuttlebutt.

  2. THere are about a zillion paces that clumps of concrete could be thrown, like i don't know, maybe...the town dump, or on your own damn property. I smell a rat.

    I hate guns, but I think if I lived in neer-do-well land, I might have one handy.

    1. That's what I told Hick! "He can take them to the landfill and PAY to get rid of them, or he can pay US to dump his trailer load of concrete in our sinkhole!"

      Sure is a lot easier to drive it across the gravel road and get rid of it "secretly," than take it a couple towns over and PAY for disposal. He could darn well see that SilverRedO was not parked under the carport. So he thought he was getting away with something.

      Hick is letting this guy skate, because he's a neighbor and hasn't done anything annoying, other than let his two dogs kill our whole flock of chickens a couple per day.

  3. Absolutely not! If it wasn't all that important, then why did Hick decide to high-tail it home? I just finished paint a 6' X 5' sign that says "No Trespassing, Privat Property, Violators will be prosecuted". I almost put "maybe, I hope" under all that. Who knows what our local sheriff will do to get out of arresting someone and actually doing the paper work.

    1. EXACTLY! Hick was concerned enough about something going down that sinkhole that he rushed home. But he excuses the guy after the fact, so he can feel magnanimous. I hope word doesn't get out that we don't care if people dump their junk in our sinkhole!

      We have those signs all along the gravel road. They don't seem to deter the Creechers. By the time a deputy shows up, they're long gone.

  4. How about "No Trespassing. Violators will be shot!"

  5. No you are not over-reacting and I wish I knew who you could complain to. Police? Local councils? He who smites wrongdoers with bolts of lightning? Can you fence off the sinkhole so people can't get close enough to throw stuff in there?

    1. I like the lightning-bolt consequence!

      According to Hick, we don't have a leg to stand on, because we don't have signs every so many feet proclaiming NO TRESPASSING. He says ANYBODY could come onto our property for any nefarious (my word, not his) reason, without danger of legal prosecution.

      As for the sinkhole, it's not noticeable unless YOU ARE LEGALLY TRESPASSING! There are trees growing around it, and it looks like a little depression or valley. You don't see the actual hole unless you're standing on the edge, looking down into the fallen leaves at the black hole to nowhere!

      People could probably cut through a fence if we didn't post NO FENCE CUTTING all over it, and catch them in the act, and hold them until a legal entity arrived!

  6. P.S. They shouldn't have been on YOUR property in the first place! Let them dig their own sinkhole if they need one.

    1. Not to mention, there are places around here with big signs proclaiming CLEAN FILL WANTED, where people can dump their dirt of concrete or blacktop chunks.