Saturday, November 17, 2018

The 1 (Week) Per CENT Her

Not a good week here in penny-hunting town. So not-good, in fact, that only one penny was found. That's only 1 CENT PER WEEK! In fact the week was SO not-good that my first attempt to write the first sentence was: nota  good week ino peenyhoungit town. Yeah. Let's be glad I adhere to a modicum of proofreading, and also not read anything Freudian into that slip.

I've been fighting the HICKovirus, and have not felt much like finding pennies. In fact, there were TWO DAYS this week that I did not even drive to town for my 44 oz Diet Coke. Sick, I tell you! Knock knock knocking on NOT-Not-Heaven's door, to hear me tell it. "She just has a little cold," to hear Hick tell it. As if he's even around, what with all his gallivanting and ignoring my plight, and even having the nerve Friday morning around noon to say, "The cold I GAVE YOU? I think YOU'RE THE ONE WHO GAVE IT TO ME!"

"Seriously? When you'd had it for 8 DAYS when I caught it through your uncleaned breather spray overnight?"

"Yeah. You got it on your hands when we went to the casino, and you gave it to me." Said the man who never even washes his hands before lunch at the burger place. Not even congratulating me on what an exemplary Typhoid Mary HICKovirus Val that I must be, to carry home a disease, give it to him, remain healthy for 8 days, THEN succumb.

He's exhausting, that Hick. Or maybe I'm just tired from not sleeping more than 45-minutes at a stretch, due to the cough waking me up for the past four nights. My eyes think they deserve to be compensated, and try to close themselves during the day. The cough is not giving in so easily. It's an equal-circadian energy-sapper. Night or day, rest or play, even while eating and drinking, or on the way to the toilet 20 times after staying extra-hydrated. Don't you just hate it when you're typing away at your New Delly, and a soggy fragment of a stick pretzel shoots explosively through your lips and onto the keyboard?

Anyhoo...on SUNDAY, Nov. 11, a day that I DID make it to town, even though light-headed and heavy-lunged...I found a penny waiting for me on the floor mat just inside Casey's.

Sheesh! You'd think they lead the nation in slip-and-fall lawsuits, what with that supply of warning signs. Don't try to tell me it's just because they mop the floor so often.

Unlike many who've come before him, this 1989 little Lincoln was FACE UP! It was kind of him to wait for me there on the mat, don't you think? Rather than wedge himself up under the Bubblicious rack like a cheeky quarter!

YIKES! I just had a coughing fit, and something popped in my lower right back area. I feel like an exploding pinata, but with guts ready to spill out instead of candy. I guess we know who's the pooper for THIS party! Dang it. Now I have to take my right hand off the keyboard every time I cough, to hold pressure on my lower right back area. It lessens the sharp pain.

I hope this HICKovirus injury heals quickly. I don't want it to hinder my hiney from bending over to pick up next week's pennies.

For 2018: This was Penny # 115.
For 2018: Dimes still at   # 15.
For 2018: Nickels still at # 4.
For 2018: Quarter still at #1.

Since 2017 (the beginning), this was Penny # 193.
Since 2017 (the beginning), this is still Dime # 21.
Since 2017 (the beginning), this is still Nickel # 4.
Since 2017 (the beginning), this is still Quarter #1.


  1. I swear there are two body parts that make my life miserable: lower back and colon.

    Now, I must start collecting coins, because you have inspired me.

    1. Always glad to be an inspiration...because I'm selfless like that!

  2. Don't you and Hick practice "sharing is caring" with your diseases?

    1. No. Neither one of us care much about sharing! Especially if it involves diseases.

  3. After teaching disease ridden teens for humpty diddle years, I would think you would be immune to even the dreaded Hickovirus.

    Hope it clears up soon.

    1. I was just thinking about that a few days ago! This HICKovirus obviously had to come from the casino, where old people convene. It has to be a strain I wasn't exposed to. It's kicking my butt!

    2. Obvious solution: Stat away from old people!!

    3. That's pretty hard to do in a casino!

  4. That Hick is a typical male, blaming you for the cold that HE brought home and generously shared.
    I hope you haven't cracked a rib with all that coughing. Both my daughters used to crack a rib every year with bronchitis which thankfully they seem to have grown out of. They never had it as children, only as adults.

    1. That's one thing I don't have yet, a cracked rib. I have pain on both sides of my back now when I cough, in the kidney area, but I'm pretty sure it's muscular.

      My boys never cracked a rib, but they both got that strep rash that used to be called Scarlet Fever. The Pony also had pneumonia twice. I would have gladly (or maybe grudgingly) taken that sickness from them, if me having it meant they were healthy. Nothing worse than watching a little kid suffer and you can't help them.

  5. Oh those hackers. Mine got bronchitis, took antibiotics, then cringed when i brought a snot nosed baby int he house. HE made the baby sick int he first place. I carry my hand sanitizer with me and douse his big old paws all when he least expects it. He shouts, "A little!" I say, "OOPS!"
    Get to a doctor, dear Val. No exploding guts or pneumonia.

    1. Aw...the poor baby! And I mean the ACTUAL baby! That's a good idea, to stealth-sanitize the paws of the Typhoid Bears. I'll have to try that.