The End of An Era

Val is now childhood-home-less.

Last Wednesday, we had the closing on Mom's house. My sister the ex-mayor's wife and I sold it to our cousin, the son of my favorite gambling aunt. He had asked us to give him a chance before we listed it. That was no problem, since we didn't really want to list it.

We had a few hiccups in the process. Sis went on vacation for two weeks while Cuz took a week's staycation to get his loan in order. Do you know how hard it is to text a form to Colorado for a signature and get it back when the signer is camping in the shadow of the Rockies? Val ran herself ragged trying to get that document to Cuz before his holiday ran out, the process made so much more difficult by Sis being incommunicado from 5:00 in the evening until noon the next day.

Anyhoo, we agreed to hold the closing between August 1 and September 1, with possession being contingent upon contents being removed. Cuz did not really have a choice. Like it or lump it, take it or leave it. I even made a trip to the house to show him and his prospective wife the interior again. Not because they couldn't decide, but because they couldn't wait to get in there.

I told Cuz that there was some furniture that we didn't want, and we would have to make arrangements to get it out. Possibly calling some auction acquaintances of Hick who buy storage lockers, who might want to buy them. Cuz said that whatever we didn't want, we could leave. I told him that sounded good, but that I couldn't speak for Sis, and I was sure she would want some compensation for the left-behinds. He said he understood.

The weekend before the closing, we had everything out of the house except some furniture. Cuz had told Hick at work the day before closing that he did not want the furniture, because his future MIL was going to get a few things for them, and they each had their own furniture already. No big deal. Cuz was given first choice, and whether he already had furnishings lined up, or whether he didn't want to pay our fee, he declined. So we moved to Plan B, and sold two couches, a recliner, and a girl's bedroom set to Hick's oldest boy, who had asked for them. In fact, I GAVE him the bedroom set, because he's a big help to Hick.

Flash to the closing. It was like old home week. Or a funeral, which is where we have been meeting each other lateley. Hugs all around. Cuz went in first. He came out, and Sis and I, along with Hick and the ex-mayor (because Missouri says they are part owners, being spouses and all) went in to sign. Cuz said he would talk to us when we came out.

Let the record show that while signing 357 documents, some which had our names misspelled by that shifty or Alzheimered co-owner of the only title company in the county...she let it slip that Cuz was waiting out front for the keys.

Cue the scratch of the needle on the phonograph record.

Sis and I cut eyes at each other. WAITING FOR THE KEYS? "We told him we are not relinquishing possession until contents are removed! He knows that." Sis was taking no guff from TitleHag, who had already scammed another death certificate from her, having misplaced the one Sis had to rush across the county before closing two weeks ago, Babe in tow, because the document was needed before paperwork could be drawn up.

"Well," said TitleHag, "one of you might want to go out there and tell him that."

Of all times for Sis to become a shrinking violet! She insisted that I go. Because I was the oldest. I stopped short of telling her, "But everybody THINKS you're the oldest!" For a minute there, I thought we might have to do rock/paper/scissors. Finally we both went out. Sis made me talk first.

VAL: "You know, Cuz, we'd really like to give you the keys tonight. But we still have to get the furniture out. I told you in that note Hick brought to work that it would take extra time if you didn't want the furniture."

CUZ: "I just bought the house. I want the keys. I gave notice on my apartment a week ago. I need to be out by Friday."

Sis found her voice. "Now, Cuz. You knew we weren't giving you the keys until the furniture was out. We didn't even have to have the closing until September 1. It's not our fault you gave notice so soon. We have never led you to believe it would all be done today. We didn't even know closing was scheduled today until Monday."

CUZ: "Okay. I'll take the furniture. I'll give you ($500 less) for the furniture. Then can I have the keys tonight?"

Let the record show that Sis and I had pre- agreed to take $500 less than the asking price on that furniture, should Cuz make a counteroffer. It wasn't so much the money, as the fact that Cuz got such a great deal on the house, and Sis didn't think he should be able to sell the furniture for profit. Because, you know, 45-year-old furniture is in high demand.

VAL: "Well, when you said you didn't want the furniture, we sold some of it to Hick's son. We didn't know you'd want it now."

CUZ: "That's okay. I'll pay for the furniture. Just give me the keys tonight. I'll follow you over there when we leave here. My girl is meeting me there."

SIS: "Now, Cuz. We will be glad to show you the inside of the house again. But we're not ready to turn it over."

CUZ: "I just bought it. I own it."

SIS: "It's filthy! We still have to clean it up. I would be embarrassed to even show it to you right now. Our mom did not live like that. It's been sitting empty since February."

CUZ: "That's okay! My girl said she wants three days of cleaning. She loves to clean! She's ready."

I did not care. Let him have it. Get it done. Sis was wavering. Raising her eyebrows at me. I nodded my head while Cuz was watching Sis. She relented. "I don't have the keys back from my kids yet, but I can give you mine and the ex-mayor's."

VAL: "And we will have to be able to get in there Saturday to get that furniture for Hick's son."

CUZ: "No problem. I just want the house tonight."

I feel for Sis. I really do. She had told me only that weekend, "You know, once we sell it, it's gone. We can't come back and walk through it. That's our childhood right there. We will only be able to drive by."

When we all convened for the key ceremony, I thought Sis was going to amble from room to room, dragging her arms along the walls in a goodbye hug. She dawdled. Talked to Cuz for an extra half-hour in the kitchen after I left. On my way out the door, I heard a little catch in her voice.

"You take good care of this house, Cuz."