Monday, October 21, 2013

Two For You...One More of the 1,423 For Me

On Friday when he bought me the gift of two Gus's pretzels, Hick bought himself a little trinket as well. He paid $20 for his present, and while I did not ask the price of my two Gus's pretzels, I'm pretty sure they cost less than $20.

He found his treasure at Goodwill. Hick is a collector of all things Coca Cola. Or nearly Coca Cola. This one is not associated with the brand, but it IS in Coca Cola colors, and will fit in with his BARn loft decor, and might possible fool somebody who's not a Coca Cola collector into thinking it belongs.

Okay. So it doesn't fit in so much with the decor of the BAR part of the BARn. It fits in with the Coke booth on the opposite side of the loft. However, Hick chose to plop it on top of the family crest on the BAR proper, probably to show off as much of his junk treasure as humanly possible. I will admit that he sent me a picture from a slightly different angle, which I deleted because it showed that last inappropriate item that he bought himself. The one that The Pony called a "drink dispenser." For a moment I did not recognize it in the background. I glanced, and assumed it to be one of those old-timey stand-up telephones with the tall body and cone-shaped earpiece on a wire. Thank goodness my background as a teacher makes me suspiciously attentive to detail.

At the rate Hick is raking in mini-fridges, free showers, drink dispensers, and cast-iron skillets of all sizes, it won't be long until his various outbuildings are completely furnished and suitable for forming our own enclave. Maybe I should sell space. Like those preppers with the missile silo divided into apartments.

I think it would be an appropriate sideline at the outlet store for my proposed handbasket factory.


  1. I think I've seen these small replica fridges with Coke logos at Orchard Supply Hardware. I don't know it you have those where you live but if you do you might want to check them out. As I recall they weren't too expensive.

  2. I think you should start a B & B--a Barn and Breakfast. Hick could retire at the same time you do--that would make for a harmonious endeavor, I imagine...

    I wonder what Hick would whip up for breakfast at your B & B?

  3. Cute little fridgie-thingy! I have a couple of Coca-Cola items I'd be happy to give to Hick, because I was planning on taking them to Goodwill, too! True! I'll e-mail you about the two items, ok?

  4. Very cool. And I noticed the Stag beer sign under the table. Haven't seen one of those in awhile.
    P.S. I do believe we have stories in the same ghostly anthology.

  5. Stephen,
    We don't have Orchard Supply here. I will check online. We have one mom & pop hardware store, and a Lowe's. No more Western Auto. No more Central Hardware. No more Ace Hardware. I blame Walmart.

    Hick likes to give the moms and pops his business. He bought my mom a little step-stool/step-ladder hybrid there for Christmas two years ago. No auction ladders for her!

    The nightmare is real. Hick is already planning to retire the same year I do. Right after his Christmas bonus.

    A Hick breakfast would include farm fresh eggs deep-fried in four inches of vegetable oil, a half pound of bacon, (also fried in oil), several diced hot dogs and garlic powder in scrambled eggs, and a 20 oz. Diet Mountain Dew right out of the bottle. Bon appetit.

    That sounds good. It may take me a couple of days to connect with you. I've got parent conferences this week. AND THE CARDINALS PLAY IN THE WORLD SERIES!

    Yes, Hick is also a Stag and Falstaff connoisseur.

    We most certainly do have stories in the same spirited anthology. I am eagerly awaiting my contributor copy. My pants are ready to be scared off. In the privacy of my own home, of course.