Sunday, January 12, 2020

One-Plus-Nine Bottles of Beer On the Block

Hick's Christmas gift from Genius was a home-brewing beer kit. They went in the kitchen and rattled some pots and pans, and got it started. Hick let it sit for two weeks, then was supposed to bottle it. I think he also added some honey for flavor. The beer was actually made from a flavor packet that came with the kit, so I'm pretty sure he's not going to poison himself.

Anyhoo...Genius also sent Hick a bottle-capping kit last week, which he'd forgotten at Christmas. Hick was on his own to find the bottles. He thought of buying regular beer and drinking it, and saving the bottles. He's not a big beer drinker, and throws away his empties.

Lucky for Hick, he's a hoarder! He had plenty of COKE bottles on hand! He just needed to clean them and sterilize them. He said there was a packet of stuff for doing that, but he felt safer boiling them. Well. You know what THAT meant. More rattling and poorly-washing and not-quite-the-same-place putting away of my pots and pans. Hick did that Friday night, rather than going out in the rain to the auction.

Imagine my horror when Hick came down to my lair and informed me that he was in the middle of boiling his Coke bottles, then DRYING THEM IN THE MICROWAVE! He saw nothing wrong with his tactic of heating up a few bottles at a time, turning the water in them left from boiling to steam! I'm pretty sure Coke bottles are not made with microwaving in mind.

Anyhoo...Hick accomplished his mission without being blinded by Coke glass shrapnel. He poured his gallon of beer into the bottles, put on the caps with his capper, and carried them down to his basement workshop to sit out of the light, and age another two weeks.


Please disregard the raspberry vinaigrette that is impersonating a bottle of Coke-beer. And the beans for tomorrow's dinner, pickle jar, Hick's Ruffles chips, and the can of random Hunts spaghetti sauce. Hick does not pay much attention to the composition of his photos. Other than to set up his Coke-beers as bowling pins.

Hick's Beerola. It's the real thing.

10 comments:

  1. Oh dear, now he's into beer. Do;t mistake it for a diet Coke. LOL
    Remember those friendship cake mixes that had to sit on the counter and ferment for days? never ate that stuff. Wouldn't drink the beer.

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    1. I don't plan to drink the beer! It at least looks different than Diet Coke. Not like the time he returned from a business trip to South Carolina with moonshine in a MOUNTAIN DEW bottle! Snuck it on the plane! With two young boys with access to it in FRIG I.

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  2. Fun hobby, but usually the big boys brew better beer.

    Why didn't he just put the bottles in the dishwas...never mind.

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    1. If Hick starts a home brewery, maybe I'll get a dishwasher! I'm pretty sure he can't sell it at his Storage Unit Store. The ATF will be on him with a quickness!

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  3. I hope the beer turns out well, it looks a bit like weak tea. I once thought about buying my hubby a home-brew kit but changed my mind when I saw the work involved, like cleaning all the bottles which would fall to me, cleaning the kit, ditto, and then storing the made beer.

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    1. Hick would not have bought it for himself, but he's putting in the work with his gift. I wish Genius lived closer, so they could experiment with different flavors. Hick wishes Genius lived closer, to share in the cleanup. I haven't had to do a thing, other than rearrange my big pots after they can't seem to put stuff back like they got it.

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  4. It does look like donkey piss(my dad's definition of beer)

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    1. I'm used to beer being in brown bottles or green bottles, or cans. So it looks odd to me, especially when comparing it to COKE in those bottles.

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  5. It's the real thing!! I remember that. I have a video of Adrienne when she was about 13 making a commercial with one of her friends. We lived in Tallahassee and all had very southern accents. She was the spokesperson in her self made commercial for Coke and she proclaims it to be the real thing in her twangy not quite adult voice! I am now on a mission to find this piece of history to share with her son!! My son in law brews beer and even grows his own hops. He enters his mead and beer in the state fair and has won some ribbons. Just think what Hick would do with some ribbons from his efforts!! Another shed?

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    1. She should have made a Shake N Bake commercial. Her accent would have been great for saying "...and I HELPED!"

      Your SIL is much more ambitious than Hick! I don't foresee Hick putting any effort into it, aside from using pre-made mixes, and washing up his dishes.

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