Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Competition Most Foul

It is not my intention to start a kerfluffle...but RULES are RULES!

We are having a Christmas door contest at work. Rules say we were allowed to start on Monday, but that nothing is to be put on the door until Wednesday during 5th hour. Of course some scofflaws are hard at it, trying to gain an advantage.

My class took their final on Monday. Then they sketched some plans for the door. I chose the design I thought was cutest and most doable in that amount of time. Today, about a third of the class worked on the door, without working on the door. They got some paper off the big rolls. Trimmed it up to door size. Stretched it out on the floor. Built a snowman. Stuck a carrot nose on him. Affixed snowflakes made by each class member to the paper. They're unique, you know. Each snowflake is different. We rolled up our door design like a giant blue burrito, and stuffed it on the library cart that holds the TV I never use. Voila! Instant door decoration on Wednesday when it's time for hanging.

By 6th hour, word got back that THREE teachers at the other end of the hall, and ONE on the far end of mine, already have portions of their design taped to their doors. Ref whistle, please! Foul! Illegal motion! Gonna have to penalize you. Except I don't dare use the word penalize in front of the students. They giggle, you know. Because they are not such a wordsmith as I.

I am confident justice will prevail. I'm not goin' down without a fight. They shall rue the day they tried to cheat in a contest entered by Val.


  1. You should challenge them to a round of "Scene It" (the Seinfeld version, if there is more than one). You'll slay them...

  2. Cheats! What is next? Bigger paper snowflakes on the windows? Kids in their places before the bell rings? Clean bathrooms on their side of the school? How dare they?!

  3. Slow but steady wins the race...or contest in this case.

  4. File a formal complaint, snatch a carrot nose, spill the beans over the intercom.

  5. Sioux,
    That would be like taking candy from babies. Which is a good deed, actually, because too much sugar is not good for babies, and that candy I take might just be a sugary orange slice that a grandma is allowing an infant to gum, and, well, we KNOW no good can come of that, unless one is trained in the baby Heimlich.

    Oh, there's more. A new style of cheater. It requires a post to itself.

    I'll tell you what was next! Children being held against my will as indentured servants!

    You're a poet and don't know it. If my group was any steadier or slower, they would be mistaken for 100-year-old Galapagos tortoises.

    The intercom must remain beanless. It must be protected at all costs. We almost destroyed the PA system today in another contest. I'll not snatch another's nose, just to say, "Got your nose!" But I HAVE put a bug in the ear of a nonwinner to file a formal complaint. It could happen. Free pizza is involved.

  6. Leenie,
    This was not some every-body-gets-a-trophy, I'm-okay-you're-okay, touchy-feely feelgood free-for-all.

    It was a cutthroat competition.