Tuesday, August 20, 2019

Conclusion: That's Bank-Way Robbery!

I left the bank, madder than a wet hen, madder than a hornet whose home was just run over by Hick on his $1700 lawnmower, madder than a teacher waking up to see that the forecast four inches of snow has not materialized. I called Hick to vent, and he SAID the phone dropped the call, in explanation of our disconnection. Thrice. When I was finally able to discuss it with him, Hick acted like it was no big deal. So I said, 

"Then you won't mind that it's YOUR weekly allowance that comes up $20 short this week. Surely you don't think I'M doing without, when I'm the one dealing with the issue. And I'm not taking away The Pony's weekly money, or shorting Christmas, the taxes, the insurance, or the Pony's extra college money cushion."

THEN Hick seemed to grasp the gravity of the situation. He declared that it's not something to ignore, because we are rightfully owed that $20, or credit for it in the account!

I hate dealing with stuff like this. Why can't people and machines just do their jobs? It's not even like I was out $300. It was only $20. But that's 11.8 Diet Cokes, by cracky! Or four scratchers! I almost (almost) wished I had been shorted more, so I would mind jumping through their hoops less.

I know the bank can't just hand out $20 to every Val, Hick, and Pony who say they were shorted. After all, I'm still Public Enemy Number One to them, after daring to deposit a check from my in-town credit union that they thought was fake, and asking to withdraw money from my own account, and trying to deposit money into Genius's account without my name being on it.

I had every intention of going back out to the branch bank on Saturday morning. Hick had that intention for me, too. I had the teller's card, with her name. She knew the situation. But she HAD already told me I'd have to file that grievance thingy, after the transaction posted to my account. I called the automated number several times Friday night, but the transaction was still pending.

Saturday morning, it had posted to my account. I punched in the number to talk to a representative. I got a machine that said to state my purpose. All it recognized was ATM. But it gave me a real live rep. Without any muzak wait, too! And even better, SHE HAD NO ACCENT! I understood every word she said!

She asked for my name, even though she could clearly see that I was calling from my home phone, and had it there in front of her. I guess that's standard policy. Their calls are possibly monitored, you know! I told her my predicament, with pertinent details such as location and time, and what I'd already done to try and resolve the issue.

I heard her typing about 100 words per minute. My own personal record (when measured) was 42 wpm on a manual typewriter when I was 16. Not that I'm bragging. I think I'm a little faster now. My students used to turn and gape at me in amazement and say, "How do you type so fast?" I'm pretty sure it was less actual amazement, and more flattery and work-avoidance.

Anyhoo... the rep told me that my grievance had been filed. My account should reconcile within 10 business days. I will get something in the mail. I might have to write out my response, so they can hear it from my own fingers. Within 45 days, I should get a report of the investigation.

"So... what if it doesn't come out that I was shorted $20? Will they take it back off my account?"


"I mean, I KNOW I didn't get that $20. I was just asking..."

"It will be in the findings of the report."

Now I'm just waiting on the mail, and for time to pass. I'll check the automated system every couple of days to see if they put the $20 back in my account. I'm pretty optimistic that they will. Only one thing possibly concerns me. Is it a bad omen that my rep's name was Katrina?


  1. LOL! My guy told me yesterday as I told him about an incident, "Don't let it ruin your day." His comment did! we have had some paranormal activity at our house. How about you?

    1. Anything out of the ordinary like that DOES ruin my day! I dwell on it until it's resolved.

      Not so much activity HERE, but The Pony had a visitor in his college apartment recently. It's in the last half of this post:


      I only hear walking. Last night, Hick apparently returned home from the auction at 7:20 in the master bathroom, at 7:52 by the front door, and at 8:30 in the living room. He was FOR SURE, PHYSICALLY home at 9:48.

  2. Mrs. C tells me Banks balance the ATM every night, they should see the $20 extra by now...actually by the same day you complained. You do them a favor as balancing the books each day is a big deal.

    1. Funny how my teller didn't even make a note about it. So much for my "favor" in helping them do their job!

      I can understand if their policy is always to fill out that "grievance" form, but you'd think they'd at least document such an irregularity, since I couldn't fill out the form yet.

  3. Mrs. C worked at a bank for 10 years.

    1. One of my old roommates, with a teaching degree, took a job in a bank after graduation. I think she worked there about 8 years. Said she got tired of counting money!

  4. A real live rep with no accent? That's a jackpot right there. Lucky you. They have to ask your name, not to check it against your phone number, but to be sure it matches the name of the account holder. After all, anybody could use your house phone if they were visiting you and you might aske them to phone for you, but the bank doesn't know that, to them it will be somebody with fraud on their mind. Anyway, I think you will get your $20 although it seems like an very roundabout way to me.

    1. Yes, no accent! The Universe took a momentary break from conspiring against me.

      Or it could have been someone just SAYING they were me! She didn't ask any security questions.