Val Spends a Cold Day in Not-Heaven

Because I am always up late, sitting on the short couch, I checked on the weather Saturday night at 3:00 a.m. There was a glaze on the brick sidewalk out front. Also on the spindly limbs of my lilac bush. By 6:00, there was a layer of sleet. Perhaps two inches. That's fine! Better than a half-inch of freezing rain. That happened over in Bill-Paying Town. They lost electricity.

Anyhoo... Hick had the wild idea that he might go to town to work on the house of a Senior Center crony. Or maybe down to his SUS2.5 (Storage Unit Store 2.5). When I mentioned the power outage, he changed his mind on the latter. 

"You don't need to go anywhere! What if something happened? I can't come rescue you. You'd just be leaving me here by myself."

Maybe Hick has a heart. He decided he wouldn't leave. But he DID have other projects. Which he started before 8:00 a.m. Let the record show that I was not thrilled. I was on the second day of a cold Hick had bestowed upon me, trying to get some sleep, stuffy and cranky. The last thing I wanted was Hick twirling around like a Tasmanian Devil, dragging out trash bags and boxes and thumping and vacuuming while I was trying to nod off in front of the TV sitting up.

Don't get me wrong. I am glad Hick always has a purpose. No grass is going to grow under his feet. I would prefer that he cleans up his own hoard, but undertaking the razing of the bedrooms of Genius and The Pony are not by far the worst behavior a wife could complain about.

By 9:00, Hick was headed outside in the sleet to burn some boxes that once held a laptop and assorted other electronic gewgaws.

"You could just burn them out by the driveway. No need to go all the way over to the BARn field."

"Val. That's where my burn pile is."

"I know. But what if you slip and knock yourself unconscious? I can't come rescue you."

"I'll have my phone with me."

"So when you're unconscious, I guess Scarlett will use her paw to dial your phone to call me?"

"I'll be fine! I'm going to load the boxes in the Gator and drive them over."

"If you don't slip on your brick sidewalk."

"You'll see the dogs running along with the Gator. I'll open the shades."

That was from The Pony's room. Then Hick carried some tubs down the basement steps. Then started on Genius's room. More carrying downstairs. THEN at 10:00, Hick sat down in his recliner and TOOK THE TV REMOTE!

"Well, I was planning to watch something at 10:00. I told you earlier that you can sit in my chair downstairs and watch the big screen."

"WHAT? What are you going to watch?"

"I had it on the REELZ channel. That guy who does the autopsies. 10:00 is Anthony Bourdain."

"Okay. I'll go downstairs."

At least Hick made his own lunch later. Crackers with Oberle Cheese and Oberle Sausage, given to him by some cronies at his SUS2.5. Then he did a load of laundry with his jacket and caps. Even put the caps in the dryer, where they thumped their metal thingies on the top against the sides.

Hick and I are not meant for togetherness. I really hope we don't get several inches on snow on top of the ice and sleet. I'm hoping it's safe for Hick to go to town on Monday. Even though I, myself, will remain warm and safe at home.