Back-of-the-Book-Blurb Friday #91 "Tough Times at Poverty Line High"

Blog buddy Sioux is hosting Back-of-the-Book-Blurb Friday. I have 150 words to convince you to fake-buy my fake book. Sit back. Take a ride with me. You can pass the time by reading my latest fake book. A fake book about real budget cuts that are slashing the costs of providing free public school education to all. When you slow down in a school zone, or wait for a crosswalk monitor to put down her hand-held STOP sign after the children are safely across the road...reach down and dig around for some loose change. Use it to fake-buy Val's latest fake book! Don't get held back while all your blog buddies are falling for Val's promotion.

Tough Times at Poverty Line High

Budget cuts have hit Poverty Line High. Teachers held contests to find ways to save. Now paperless and bookless, students read and turn in assignments on their phones. EVERYBODY has a phone! No excuses there.

Tech school students have doubled up the districts buses to use half the fuel. Extra pay for stunt drivers is more than made up when doublebuses take shortcuts down embankments, flipping to have room for the next route's riders. The only modifications are seatbelts made by the FACS class, to hold students in the upper bus seats, and welding two buses together, done by tech school dudes who hang out at stock car tracks on the weekends.

Now parents are sticking their noses where they don't belong. Something about "safety concerns." Will students and staff be allowed to proceed? Or will the school board flip out a big red STOP sign? (146 words)

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Fake Reviews for Val’s Fake Book

Jeff Spicoli..."All I need are some tasty waves, a cool buzz, and not to read a fake book by this fake writer.  I'd rather sit in Mr. Hand's class without snacks than do that!" 

The Wheels on the Bus..."We're going round and round on this one. The concept is solid, but we wheels only get half as much grease. On thing we're NOT going round and round on is the future of this fake author. She's wanting to take the route to success, but she's not making all the stops."

Otto, Bus Driver for Bart and Lisa Simpson..."Fifteen crashes and not a single fatality! Can these bus stunt drivers say the same? I think not! I know one person who can't. This fake author! Ninety fake books, and considerably more than one fatality. Don't fake-buy this fake book unless you are comfortable taking your life into your hands!"

Chang and Eng..."This might have been the perfect job for us--had we not been busy fathering 21 children between us. And we DO mean between us. This fake author should have no job at all. She's like a parasite that clings to you, one that you cannot rid yourself of."

Cosmo Kramer..."I gotta get me one of these buses! I could get TWICE as many people on her for my reality tour. I'll have to cut out the pizza bagel, and switch the bite-size Three Musketeer to a mini KitKat bar. They can break off a piece for their neighbor. One thing's for sure. I would never sell my experiences to this fake author for her autobiography! Nobody would ever believe that she knocked out Mickey Mantle at fantasy baseball camp. Just like they won't ever believe that she's a real author."

A Ticonderoga #2 Pencil..."I want my shade of yellow back! Not from the doublebus. That's cool. I want my shade of yellow back from Thevictorian. She's a sniveling coward who can't write, even fakely, and rips people off with her fake books worse than The Good Feet Store with their outrageously-priced shoe inserts."