There Shall Be No Siding with Hick

Later Tuesday evening, when Hick seemed sufficiently recovered from his "broken" arm after Old Buddy's ladder/drill faux pas... I asked if he had any more pictures for me from Cheap House.

"No. I sent you some on Monday. There ain't nothin' new to see."

"What about the siding? That's what I've been waiting for. Pictures with the siding on the back of the house, now that the roof is done."

"I already sent them."

"No. It's just the plywood."

"That's SIDING, Val!"

"We've been through this before. It looks like plywood. I mean the white vinyl siding, like the rest of the house. The part you took off the back around the window, and the siding HOS saved from tearing down that back porch bedroom. You said you were going to use that so everything would match."

"There isn't enough. There's no long pieces."

"Even after you said HOS saved it? That was your plan. To put the same siding back on."

"No. This is the kind I'm using. It's SIDING, Val. It even has a name: [BLAH BLAH BLAH] siding."

"It looks terrible and unfinished. Just like you tried to do on Bargain House without any paint or anything."

"Everybody likes it, Val. They tell me it looks good."

"We've been through this before! Of course your friends are going to say it looks good."

"Realtor Guy said so, too!"

"Of course! He wants to be sure you list it with him!"

"Well, he wants to be sure to get the most for his commission, too!"

"Not a single one of 'my people' like this look. It's like unfinished plywood."

"It's SIDING, Val! And yes, that's how I'm leaving it."

"I bet it will take $2000 off the sale price! Because any flipper will know they have to get siding for the back of the house."

"Whatever."

I call shenanigans! All along, Hick has said he was putting that matching siding back on the house. Now all of a sudden, he can't do it. So he went and bought this wood "siding" to cover the back of the house. An expense we don't need, which makes the house look worse! Also, unless Realtor Guy makes a habit of driving the 20 miles from Bill-Paying Town every day to admire Hick's handiwork, I don't think he's been there since the one time Hick told him we wanted to list it with him. The roof wasn't done yet, and for sure the "siding" wasn't on the back of the house.

Once again, I seek your honest opinion on this look...