Tuesday, January 5, 2021

We Know What You Did Last Town Trip

Hick keeps Val on a short leash. He can leave at the crack of pre-dawn, be gone all day, and return in time for supper to be made for him, all with no communication or prior mention. Val must account for her whereabouts 24/7/365. "Where are you? What are you doing?" Her routine nightly dalliances in her dark basement lair are questioned, even though she is directly below Hick's recliner-propped feet.

Sunday, Hick stopped SilverRedO beside the driveway as I was about to make my escape. So intent was he on where I was going that he didn't take notice of his surroundings. He announced that he was going to roust The Pony to help him take down the Christmas decorations.

"Uh. The Pony isn't here. Don't you see that his car is missing? He has gone to lunch with a friend."

"Oh. Well. I guess I'll start without him."

I went on about my (allegedly clandestine) business, buying scratchers and a 44 oz Diet Coke. When I returned home, I saw that sentinels awaited me.

 
Santa looks a bit judgy, don't you think? And Frosty seems to be SHUNNING me! Not sure what happened to Frosty. I hope Hick didn't put a boot up his snowy rumpus. I can understand why he has a BRICK stuffed in there, but not why his hole is in such rough shape.

If seeing those two through the people-door of the garage was not disconcerting enough, look what greeted me as I passed through that portal!

 
Good thing I was guilty of nothing more than  caffeine and gambling addictions! Too bad The Pony parks out by the carport, and wouldn't be walking that path. HE'S the one they have a beef with, methinks! HE'S the one who will be climbing the ladder to lay them across the garage rafters until next Christmas.

 
My Sweet, Sweet Juno wanted nothing to do with this inquisition! There she is, dejectedly fading away towards her house. Actually, she may have come to provide me support, but Hick had blocked her way. She's not one to slink under the metal chair to get to me.

I'm not sure how Hick rewards his plastic spies, but I have a feeling that he pays off the furry ones with FREE frozen expired individual cherry fried snack pies...

8 comments:

  1. Fried cherry snack pies? Are they okay for dogs to eat? Around Christmas time our newspaper had a very long list of things not good for pets to eat and I only read the cat section since I don't have a dog. I guess once in a blue moon would be okay for the cherry pies.
    That first Santa needs painting. That could be a job for The Pony.

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    1. It's like a Hostess Fruit Pie, about half or 1/3 the size. The filling is mainly a thick jelly-like consistency, without real fruit, I'm thinking. I didn't see one myself. I'm imagining the kind they served at school sometimes.

      Hick said he threw one to each dog, back when he first mentioned having them at the BARn. I know dogs can't have chocolate, even though my dad used to toss our miniature poodle chocolate-covered peanuts. He survived.

      The first Santa belonged to my grandma, so he's pretty old! Not sure how paint would stand up to being heated by the light inside.

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    2. I didn't realise the Santa was a light-up model. You'll have to research the best kind of paint for him.

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    3. Yes, Santa has a light in his belly. As do the other figures. I think that's what cooked off some of his paint over the years, since we don't leave him out all year long, baking in the sun.

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  2. My wise old guy was charging one of his outdoors spy cmaeras IN THE HOUSE, so essentially it was tracking me in the kitchen. One of these days!

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    1. You must be Public Enemy #2. Our pictures will be side by side in the post office. Six feet apart, and behind plexiglass.

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  3. Krylon spray paint will do the trick. I have even used it on plastic outdoor chairs.

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    1. I'm sure Hick will know where to find that. His head is full of stuff like that, rather than common sense.

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