A New Tactic: Kindness Part II

On the same day that I nearly succumbed to heat stroke at the store, after wrestling with T-Hoe's back hatch that wouldn't open due to Hick's one trip driving him...I almost succumbed to heat stroke AGAIN at the hands of Hick.

I was home again, pulling the big green dumpster up to the end of the driveway. You've seen pictures. It's a substantial dumpster. And a substantial driveway. About a tenth of a mile up, tenth of a mile back. It was pretty hot that day, you know. So Val was movin' mighty slow at 2:00, under the afternoon sun, eyes down against the glare, still wearing her town clothes and shoes. We'd been having thunderstorms in the evenings, so I wanted to get that dumpster out while it was clear.

Here came Hick on the Gator! I was almost to the end, ready to park that dumpster. Maybe 10 steps left to go. He was grinning like a Jack-O-Lantern. So happy to see me. Stopping to visit, while he was sitting in the shade of his homemade Gator roof, and I was treading on gravel, balancing a dumpster. Of course he didn't turn off the Gator. He wanted to chat, but I could hardly hear him, what with the motor running, and the dumpster wheels crunching on the gravel.

"I can't hear you over the Gator. I can't stand here right now."

I went on to park the dumpster. As I was turning it to the most stable position, so it wouldn't tip over and break the lid if another storm sprung up before morning...I heard the Gator pop into gear and start moving.

"Oh. Hick must be coming to give me a ride back down the driveway. That's so nice."

Once I situated the dumpster and turned around, Hick was parking under the carport! Uh huh. He'd driven back to the house, leaving me to walk. When I got there, after fending off a jumping Jack, who was dripping from a dip in the creek, I saw Hick sitting in the chair on the side porch. I guess he'd enjoyed watching me walk back. I felt like the classic description of a heat stroke victim, but my dripping flesh downgraded me to mere heat exhaustion.

"I can't believe you! I thought you were going to give me a ride back, but you just took off and left me. To walk."

"Oh. Well. I didn't know you wanted a ride. You always say you don't want one. So I was just making you happy, letting you walk."

"That's when I'm out walking laps, in my walking clothes, after the sun is down, the purpose being out there to WALK."

"Oh. Well. I'm sorry. I'll give you a ride next time."

There is none so kind as Hick who IS TRYING TO KILL ME, now with kindness!