Tuesday, June 6, 2017

The Magnanimous Mr. Hick

He's a chameleon, that Hick! A riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma, stuffed in an old pickle jar, rolled up in Grandma's handmade quilt, packed in a steamer trunk, and awaiting the highest bidder at the auction.

Monday I made a trip to Walmart. Hick knew I was going. He's off now on Mondays, you know. I have suggested that on one of them, we might make a trip to the closest casino. My treat, of course. I DO have a $15 food credit that will buy us each a delicious hamburger there. I had mentioned it on Saturday or Sunday, knowing that this Monday was not feasible, because Hick had a doctor's appointment in his workplace town at 1:30.

Anyhoo...Hick knew I was going to Walmart over in Bill-Paying Town, because I asked what treats he might want from there, them having some different snacks that our usual Walmart. He asked for some individual packs of lemon sandwich cookies. They're probably all the rage with diabetics these days, right after the clandestine Casey's donuts.

I left my phone in T-Hoe this time. Not intentionally. But it was just as well, because I don't take in my purse, and that phone in my pocket pulls my pants down when I walk. I probably need to get some new pants. Anyhoo...I came out of Walmart at 11:30 and saw that I'd missed a text from Hick.

"If you want to run to Casino this afternoon we can you just have to ride to Doctor with me"

Huh. That was SO not going to happen. Yes, the doctor was on the way to the casino. But I had no desire to sit around in a urologist's office, even with that casino carrot dangling at the end of the stick. Besides, it was 11:00 when Hick sent the text. He KNEW that I was in Bill-Paying Town. A trip which takes me 45 minutes minimum one way. AND he would need 45 minutes from home to get to his appointment on time. There was no way I was going to make it home and put away groceries and find my casino card and gambling money in time for him to leave for the doctor. Besides, I'd already spent money on my scratch-off tickets that I would have given HIM for casino purposes.

I guess it's the thought that counts. Even though I think he only offered to get credit for offering, knowing full well that I would have to say no.

Sometimes, Hick is like those Sour Patch Kids. First he's sour...then he's sweet.

10 comments:

  1. That Hick is a sweet tart alright.

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    1. He has his moments. He's like Forrest Gump's mom's box of chocolates: you never know what you're gonna get.

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  2. It's a good trick, getting credit for asking when you know it can't happen...good trick, but it never works.

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    1. I think Hick knows that, but he doesn't stop trying.

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  3. But wasn't he first sweet... and then sour?

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    1. If you've got that figured out, we're going to put you on the chicken-or-the-egg case!

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  4. There is nothing wrong with building credit, comes in handy sometimes ;)

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    1. If there's anyone who needs to build credit, it's definitely Hick!

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  5. HeWho will ask me if I would like to ride along with him when he has a tow that is a long drive. Why would I want to ride in the cab of a cigarette smelling tow truck? It is not like we will have a conversation, the engine noise would prevent that. I think it is ammo for when I say we never go anywhere together.

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    1. Or maybe he just wants you to admire his mad towing skillz!

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