Val does not like to disappoint.
Thar she blows! The MAILBOX BOOT! Tell me you have one of THESE. I think not.
There it was, big as life, as if posed specifically for Val's cell-phone-camera-without-a-lens. Uh huh. As if some Weirdo Jr. had sensed my upcoming trip, at 10:45 for the 11:00 pickup time, to mail Genius his weekly envelope filled with a typed letter with no spelling corrections, a five-dollar bill and a one-dollar bill for Chinese food, and two scratch-off lottery tickets full of hope.
Yep. Some little kid is hopping around on one foot. Either avoiding getting his tootsies wet by holding up his socked foot, or hopping consciously on that socked foot to get it as wet as possible while holding up his booted foot. Weirdo Jr.s will do that, you know.
No, T-Hoe's mirror is NOT up against the mailbox mouth. That's a little lesson in perspective.
BUT...don't forget to admire the way Val got all artsy-fartsy and included a shot of the dead-mouse-smelling post office in her side mirror! Okay. So that was just a happy accident that I saw later when I looked at the picture. Rumors of Val's artsy-fartsiness have been greatly exaggerated.
Toddler Genius once lost a shoe on the zoo train at the St. Louis Zoo. As we climbed off, five or six people hollered, "SHOE! SHOE! Your boy lost a SHOE!" And one of them ran to us and handed it over the fence.
What kind of world are we living in? A world where nobody bothers to tell a parent that their kid lost a WHOLE BOOT!
I've got to get my proposed handbasket factory back on the fast track.
If he is not missing the boot, he better stay out of any ass kicking contests.
ReplyDeleteUNLESS it's an a$$ kicking contest for one-booted entrants only.
DeleteI was thinking one boot...one leg. Not good odds in an AKC.
DeleteYeah, me too. So they would all be equal if they all had one leg! You might be amazed at what they could do.
DeleteI've been given "the boot" several times in my life but I've never left one anywhere.
ReplyDeleteThat's a gift for a man who keeps on giving. I would imagine that many people have also shown your their door, but you didn't really look at it.
DeleteI think you could put all your artsy-fartsy photos in a coffee table book. And the coffee table book could have fold-out little legs... like a coffee table.
ReplyDeleteThat's a great idea. But I hope nobody takes my photo book into a bathroom! Wait! Then I could make them buy it. Maybe I'll put a rack of them right outside the bathroom...
DeleteWhy do I have the feeling that the coffee table that book goes on would only have 3 legs?
DeleteHere now! Let the record show that the coffee table that book would go on has ALL FOUR of its legs, although one IS wobbly, and the top has a mousepad size piece of the wood laminate missing, because young Genius, upon giving the mousepad as a gift, peeled off the backing to show Val how non-skid it was.
DeleteThat mousepad was really, REALLY non-skiddy.
Even 'face beauty mode' couldn't improve on that photo - I applaud your arty - fartsiness!
ReplyDeleteThanks! My artsy-fartsiness salutes you. I think your "yacht-driving, face beauty mode" photo should be your new avatar.
DeleteDid you check to see if there was a wad of cash in the toe of that boot? Firefighters stand on street corners in the big city with their boots in hand... soliciting.
ReplyDeleteNO! And that boot was still there an hour ago when I mailed Genius's letter for this week. In fact, there's a corner a block over where they usually collect a the 4-way stop.
DeleteI think a kid just walked out of it, or it fell off the back of a truck, where guys around these parts stuff their rubber boots upside down between the toolbox and the cab.