"No. I never sent you no email at 1:20. I'm asleep then. I sent you one at 8:30 last night, from the auction."
The Pony overheard. "Dad. You have to have at least three bars to send a picture. The auction has terrible reception. So it just took that long to send."
We didn't need the picture then, because Hick made The Pony put on his shoes with his pajamas and go help carry in part of the auction spoils. The Pony came back all excited. "That's really cool, what Dad bought for me. One of them is sitting on the back porch next to Juno's house, under the shield that he got me last year."
I went out to have a look. Yes, it was a pretty good auction find. I told The Pony to take a picture for me, because nothing pleases Hick more than hearing that I have shared his escapades with the Blogosphere. When retrieving the picture from my email, I clicked on the original 1:20 a.m. picture again.
Oh, dear.
Here's the real thing, in a tasteful photo taken by The Pony.
Just what everybody needs, right, to put on the back porch beside their sweet, sweet Juno's house? I swear. One of these days we're going to be on that Extreme Vacation Homes show. Except I live it every day. Not just on vacation.
Oh, there was a set of two of these suits of armor knight thingies. The other one, according to The Pony, is beside the $65 gas grill, also an auction find, until Hick decides where he wants to put it.
Might I suggest the Little Barbershop of Horrors?
When I was a kid I would have gone out of my mind to own this suit of armor. Hick must still be a kid at heart. Is that an understatement?
ReplyDeleteI think they should be together--perhaps one on each side of your home's door?
ReplyDeleteWith treasures like those, you NEVER want to dilute their impact.
It could have been an un-PC cigar store native american.
ReplyDeleteFrom what you've posted your place will never be considered boring or humdrum. Hick's got good taste and fine decor under his thumb.
ReplyDeleteI was going to suggest protecting the front door but Sioux-ie beat me to it. Good suggestion.
ReplyDeleteStephen,
ReplyDeleteYes, he's a kid at heart, and in mind. But this is not the kind of stuff that appeals to him. I think he was feeling guilty about looking for household furnishings for Genius, and decided he should also look for items that please The Pony.
Nah. That would mean he was reasoning. He just liked the armor.
*****
Sioux,
You know, that might be just what we need. Hick could screw a red plastic milk crate to each one, right where the hands are, so they are ready to receive packages. One from UPS, one from FedEx. Like oversized salt and pepper shakers that take instead of give.
*****
joeh,
It very well could have been. Then Hick would be out of control, calling ahead to restaurants to arrange for seating, giving gifts and then asking for them back, and buying tickets from those guys standing outside stadiums.
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Leenie,
Let's HOPE it's his thumb.
*****
Catalyst,
Sioux knows her way around a comment, but hopefully not around my front porch.
First thing I saw when I looked at the picture! Wondered if anyone else noticed it. Gives a whole new meaning to giving someone the finger.
ReplyDeleteI have that message, too. I thought I was being targeted, that perhaps Blogger found me to be explicit and vulgar. I try to to keep it appropriate, but my inspiration for my posts make it hard. Ooops, I did it again.
I am still laughing as He Who comes in to play in the wood stove fire. I show him the photo in question, as he wants to know what I am laughing at. I turned around the computer and said, "Look at this picture and tell me what you see." He said, "Is that a pigeon up in the corner?" I said "What are you looking at?" He comes closer, leaving the propane torch hanging from the doors of the wood stove, "It looks like a pigeon to me." Then he says,"Oh it must be the finger of the person taking the picture."
ReplyDeleteSo, you see what I am dealing with here ...... a pigeon.
Kathy,
ReplyDeleteI didn't notice at first, because it was around 2:00 a.m., and I saw it on my phone. My bleary eyes were trying to figure out the armor. Then it jumped out at me when I went to save it to my computer. Looks like somebody warned Blogger to cease and desist, because now MY message says those plans won't be implemented. You're safe to continue your wicked ways.
A PIGEON? What in tarnation is wrong with He Who's eyes? And a FINGER? First I thought he had a vivid imagination...then...no.