Who Will Pluck This Pesky Jewel

When we last convened, Val was vowing not to crank back her OPC (Old People Chair), lest she fall asleep, slack-jawed, and awake to something quite unpleasant dripping into her gaping maw. 

Good thing do-gooder Hick vowed to do good in his own homestead. Sure, he took The Pony on a three-county tour to a graveyard the next morning. But they were back by 1:00, and as soon as Hick licked his fingers clean of Captain D's fish, he was ready to replace the wax ring of the toilet in the boys' bathroom.

Hick is a master of designating duties. While he was eating, he instructed The Pony to move all objects out of the bathroom, and clean around the toilet, and unscrew the bolts. Hick may or may not have already had The Pony turn off the toilet's water, and drain the tank. I don't know much about replacing a toilet's wax ring. I was in the shower when they returned home.

What I DO know is that as soon as Hick started handy-manning, Neighbor Tommy called about his car not starting, and needing a ride back to work after lunch. In 10 minutes! Hick told him he'd need to find someone else, because he had just started taking out a toilet. Tommy asked if Hick could find someone else for him. Um. No. Not this time. There IS a limit to Hick's selflessness. On this day, a toilet was more important than Tommy's afternoon shift.

Apparently, the operation was a success, and the patient has lived to flush again. The plywood flooring was not damaged to the point of needing replacement, which was Surgeon Hick's greatest concern. He had plenty of healthy wood in which to attach the bolts to screw down the toilet after its wax ring transplant. "That wood will dry out again, now that the leak is gone." He said the operation took about 30 minutes.

Later that evening, as I was sitting on the short couch while Hick ate his supper, The Pony whirled into the living room while running his nightly bath in the big triangle tub.

"Oh, Mom. Do you want to see what we found in the toilet?"

"Um. I'm not sure..."

"It's in my room. I'll get it!"

Out came The Pony, fist closed, waving it under my chin.

"Are you ready?"

"I guess so. But get it away from me! I don't want something pulled out of a toilet in my face!"

The Pony opened his hand.

 

"It's a piece of AMETHYST! Don't worry, I washed it off."

"In the TOILET? It was in the TOILET?"

"In the tank. We don't know how it got there."

"I'm pretty sure we know who put it there!" Said Hick. I assume he meant The Pony.

The Pony has always had an affinity for rocks. In his early elementary days, I'd have to dump rocks out of his pockets before washing his tiny jeans. When asked about them, The Pony explained:

"Those are my jewels! I find them on the playground at recess!"

I can't imagine Young Pony lifting the heavy lid off the toilet tank, and stashing a prized jewel such as this piece of amethyst in there. He had a sink right in front of him if he wanted to splash around with his jewel while on the toilet. No need to contort himself and lift a lid that weighed half as much as he did.

Young Genius, however... the arch nemesis of Young Pony, might have found the amethyst forgotten on the sink, or dropped on the floor, and plunked it into the tank for revenge. He was always a strapping young specimen, tallest in his class.

 

Young Genius was not one to hang onto rocks. Young Pony was an aficionado of Grab Bags of assorted minerals, bought for him at the Annual Rock Swap my grandma used to work at, up at the old lead mine museum. Young Pony also kept a special box of his best "jewels" from the playground, the creek, and the "panning for gold" activity at Meramec Caverns, where he got to keep what he sorted from a bucket of rocks.

I guess we may never know how the amethyst got into the toilet tank. But one thing's for certain. It has now been reunited with The Pony.