Hick's building spree has been sidelined by his Storage Unit Store. Between selling there on Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays, and going to auctions on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Fridays, and Saturdays...he barely has time to lift a hammer any more. Hick's Shackytown has not zoned in any new structures for over a year. Maybe longer.
With his newest storage unit purchase, a 50-50 venture with his son The Veteran, Hick acquired some fine art. I showed you the painting of this Phone-A-Lisa last week (with an added brassiere, courtesy of Paint and Val), but here it is again. Just because, heh, heh.
Too bad our old blog buddy Stephen hung up his blogging hobby. He might have been able to advise Hick on hanging out a shingle for a Storage Unit Gallery of fine art such as this. Here's what Hick has discovered since sending out that picture to people who didn't really want it.
This painting, Hick says, is in the neighborhood of 12" x 18". Or maybe 18" x 24". You know how men are with measurements. It is oil on canvas, by Larry Vincent Garrison. Garrison was a former marine who became a portrait artist. He branched off from painting families to paint nudes. He has paintings hanging in Vegas casino lobbies, and galleries throughout the world. Garrison did most of his originals on masonite. The painting Hick found is an oil transfer on canvas. Whatever that means.
Here's the thing. The Veteran did some research, and found a Larry Vincent Garrison painting on eBay for $10,000. That's right. I said TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS! Of course, that's just the listing. It hasn't sold for that. This got Hick and The Veteran all excited (more than just their excitement at viewing the painting). They know that they'll get nowhere near that amount for their naked lady. They're hoping to come out of it with a hundred dollars apiece.
Hick is going to take that naked lady to the city next week, to an auction house that holds walk-in appraisal days on the last Tuesday of the month. Hick hopes to sell it to the auction house outright if they give him an offer, or list it with them if the commission isn't too high. Because what is he going to do, really, with a painting of a naked lady? He's going to ask about the fair market value, and make his decision based on that.
He also found other paintings in that storage unit. I guess they're not as TITillating , because he hasn't sent me any pictures of them. He says he has a black stallion in a desert on velvet. No poker-playing dogs, as far as I know.
My thirteen-year-old-self is tittering, and I think you know why.
ReplyDeleteI can think of two reasons why...
DeleteIs Elvis riding the stallion in that velvet painting?
ReplyDeleteSadly, no. I don't think that's how he left the building.
DeleteI've done some research, that painting is worth $1,000,000,but with the painted-in bra it is only worth $.25
ReplyDeleteDoggone it! I KNEW I shouldn't have drawn it on the actual painting!
DeleteThe Black Stallion on velvetis probably hobbytex. Remember Hobbytex? Those tubes of fabric paint to fill in designs printed on either fabric or velvet?
ReplyDeleteI hope the auction house quotes a good price for Hick's painting.
I don't remember the tubes, but I remember paint-by-number! I'll put up pictures of the stallion and the others when Hick sends me better ones. Or the unfocused ones, if he doesn't.
DeleteThis could be your fortune!! I am willing to bet that a man will buy it.
ReplyDeleteHeh, heh! I think you must be psychic about the buyer!
DeleteThey're hoping for a couple hundred minimum. You never know, if they have to auction it. Might go for a song.