Monday, June 19, 2017

Hick, the Great Provoker

When we left off in the Property Owners vs. Crazy Dude saga...the court papers had been dropped onto Crazy Dude's land, right in front of his nose, when the Process Server held them out and Crazy Dude refused to take them. Crazy Dude retreated back down his wooded driveway to his out-of-sight house.

Hick said he hoped there came a big rain from those purple storm clouds, so the papers would be destroyed, and Crazy Dude wouldn't have the court date, and the restraining order would become permanent since he refused to show up to the hearing. Hick also said other things.

"If I was Bev, I'd go out and trim my bushes along his property line." (No comment on Hick thinking about trimmed bushes!)

"No! Why would she? I understand if she wants to clean up her property, and it's all overgrown, that she shouldn't let a fear of Crazy Dude keep her from doing whatever landscaping she wants. But to concentrate on that section right next to him is just asking for trouble. It's provoking!"

Uh huh. That would be like a 9-year-old going to sit on the property line of her yard and her next-door-neighbor best friend's yard, to play with pick-up sticks, and make her best friend's beagle puppy on a chain go crazy, and get yelled at from the back door. Not that Li'l Val would know anything about such a tactic.

The night of the envelope-dropping, there DID come some rain, in the wee hours of the morning. Hick said that when he went by Crazy Dude's driveway the next morning, the envelope was gone.

Let the record show that Val has no idea why Hick was anywhere near Crazy Dude's driveway. That road is the road he takes to work on Tuesday/Wednesday/Thursday. Not the road we take to town. And as far as Val (or the record) knows...Hick does NOT go to work on Saturdays, or have a need to drive by that area.

Hick figures that Crazy Dude came out in the middle of the night, when he thought he wouldn't be seen, and picked up the envelope. When Hick said this, I imagined Crazy Dude in camouflage gear, crawling on his belly like a serpent, knife clutched in his teeth in case he needed to intimidate a witness.

The hearing is in the middle of July. Hick figures that Crazy Dude will be at the hearing, to say that he never was served the papers, so the restraining order is not valid. However... Hick also figures that such a tactic will only prove that Crazy Dude WAS served the papers, because how else would he know when to show up at the hearing. So the point would be moot, he was served! Present a valid reason as to why he should not be banned from contacting Bev, or stay away from her.

Meanwhile, I have been nervous when I hear a four-wheeler coming up the road during my walks. Just in case it's Crazy Dude, scoping out our house for future revenge. I'd rather he not know what I look like, since I don't know him, either. I told Hick, and he said, "That's not him. Listen. He has a 4-stroke engine. That's a 2-stroke. It whines." AS IF that means anything to me. Hick might as well be reading a manual on how to fly a 747 to Puppy Jack. Except that Hick doesn't read manuals. Anyhoo...he eventually got me to understand that a 4-stroke engine has a loud roar, and a 2-stroke engine sounds like a motorcycle ree-ree-ree engine. Not that I have time to run back to the house if the wrong one is coming up the road, anyway.

I heard gunshots back over the creek when I was walking Saturday evening. I figure it was either Bev, whose husband just got a gun, or Crazy Dude, who probably has an arsenal...having target practice. I'm glad there's a forest between us.

12 comments:

  1. This is all a bit scary...makes one reach for a dirty water cocktail.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I agree that this is starting to sound scary. I hope that guy stays on his own property and leaves everyone else alone.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I hope so! I think he's probably spittin' mad, and he'll show up in court and make a spectacle. Or...he'll stew quietly, avoid court, and plan an elaborate revenge on Bev and Hick and HOS.

      Delete
  3. Val--You might get enough material to write a screenplay. Who would play Crazy Dude?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Christopher Walken! He's batpoop crazy!

      Even though Willem Dafoe looks more the part. He's what I imagine when I think of Crazy Dude.

      Then there's always Gary Busey if the other two are already booked...

      Delete
  4. This is terrifying enough without the added worry of gunshots.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, I also heard some Saturday afternoon around 3:00. That's not hunting time! The animals are laid up in the shade then.

      I don't even know if there's a legal hunting season right now, but that never stops people out here. At least they eat what they shoot. ANIMALS! I'm talking about animals! I hope they don't shoot people!

      Delete
  5. When we lived in a condo complex there was a man about fifty, a tad off, who lived with his mother in the wooded area where we always walked. A builder bought the wooded area and ripped out the trees. Last walk we took, we found crazy dude's boots behind a tree where he must have stood at night and looked into condo windows. You never know who is watching.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. YIKES! Like I'm not paranoid enough already! Thanks for that little bedtime story.

      Delete
  6. Yes definitely need to keep an eye out for Crazy Dude, this is sounding serious, wonder if the road arm was his?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Heh, heh! That road arm was a few years ago, but Crazy Dude was living here then. Maybe it was his throw-down arm! Or maybe he was hiding, waiting for someone to stop for it, and then he'd yank it away on a piece of fishing line. Just for sport.

      In case others didn't see the link on your blog, I'll put it here. I think most of my people already saw it back then. But who can resist a re-read about a road arm? Not this ol' Val.

      http://unbaggingthecats.blogspot.com/2013/01/the-very-special-episode.html

      Delete