Monday, June 12, 2017

From the "You're Not EVEN Gonna Believe This One" Files, June 12, 2017

It is 6:30 and I just returned home from a surprise casino trip. Surprise, because even though Hick did a good deed by taking me, as late as 8:00 p.m. last night, he assured me that he was not going to spring such an opportunity on me. He did that last week, you know, as I was coming out of Walmart, unable to get back home by the time we would have left so he could make a doctor's appointment on the way.

Anyhoo...Hick had business in court this morning. That's a story for later, but he's not being locked up, if that was the first thing to cross your mind. I had planned to get up early (before 9:00, I'm on RPT [Retired People Time], you know) and color my hair (yes, Val is unnatural) and go to Walmart. I slept in (because I could) and Hick's call (he has the worst timing ever) got me out of the shower.

After making me listen to the minutia of the court procedure, Hick said he was on the way home. I asked what he was doing the rest of the day, because I was headed to Walmart, and didn't want any surprises. I specifically said, "You're not going to offer to take me to the casino, are you? Because I need to know now, since I'm heading to Walmart and then getting my big soda." (That's a 44 oz Diet Coke to you.) Hick's answer was: "I wouldn't necessarily rule that out." So I pinned him down to take me, and got my stuff together while he was on the way home. After I dried off and dressed, of course.

Here's where things get all wacky. On the way there, I endured more chatter about court. Then a call to Hick from somebody asking him how much a door costs these days. His cell (PHONE) number is one off from Lowe's. And we chatted about Tommy, and how much money I was going to give Hick for gambling, and how long we were staying, and what we'd have for lunch (big burger and fries, forget the two-for-one buffet coupon).

As we were nearing the casino, I said to Hick, "I wonder if I'll find any pennies today. I've been finding them all over in the last week." Hick declared that he finds them all the time on the parking lot at work. "They're pennies from heaven, you know. Somebody is trying to tell you something." Hick humored me. Because he knows which side his bread is buttered on, and who butters it.

I told Hick that he didn't have to drop me off at the door. "It's so hot today. I'll just use this as my walk. Even if it means I get all sweaty walking in. This will be my workout today." Hick pulled into a parking space at the opposite end of the complex from the casino. He always parks there. But normally he drops me off at the front door, by valet parking.

I opened my door to get out, and guessed it...a PENNY! "Look at that! I can't believe it. I was just talking about finding a penny. I wrote about it two days ago." I picked it up, and put it in my shirt pocket. I don't mix the found pennies with my regular change. Hick kind of snorted. But again, he humored me.

Right now I'm not going into the gambling specifics, but I'll just stay that Hick and I stopped for lunch at Burger Brothers at 12:40. After a delicious meal, we decided that we'd go our separate ways again, Hick going back to the non-smoking area, and me heading to the penny machines. I'm switching things up these days.

No sooner did I walk across the gaming area to the penny section on the right than I noticed my PLAYER'S CARD WAS NOT IN MY POCKET! Nor was it in my purse. My player's card was missing! Gotta have the player's card! I had $20 in free play today! That's nothing to sneeze at. Gotta accumulate free play credits.

The only place I could think of to find my player's card was back at the machine where I met Hick. Of course, the casino will issue you a new player's card, but attached to it was the green stretchy old-style-phone-cord kind of keyring that I had used at school for at least 15 years. In fact, when I RETIRED and turned in my work keys, I walked back into the principal's office and asked him for my keyring. It has sentimental value.

On my way back to the rear of the casino to the non-smoking area, to look for my card and keyring, as I turned the curve in the carpet in front of the cashier's windows, I saw a PENNY on the carpet! You can bet I stopped to pick it up. TWO PENNIES in one day, by cracky! Somebody really loves me!

I found my player's card laid out on the machine, and took it back. Slots slots slots blah blah blah story for later. Hick and I left the casino around 4:00. He decided to take the back roads to avoid sitting in rush hour traffic. As we got closer, I told him that when we got home, I was going to town for my soda. "We can do that on the way," he said. "It's only 9 miles down the highway from our short cut." So he saved me a trip back to town.

"I want to go to Orb K for my soda and some lottery. The gas station chicken store may not be on another roll since my last winner. I wonder if I'll find a penny there today. That would be freaky! I just found one in Orb K the other day. But I already found TWO today!"

Hick parked the car where in my usual spot at Orb K. But I was getting out of the passenger side this time. I opened up my door and could not believe what I saw in the middle of the empty parking spot next to us. "LOOK! Do you SEE that? It's a PENNY!" Hick did not see it, probably because my boobage was in the way of him looking out my door to the ground. But you can bet I picked that penny up and stashed it on the floor mat of A-Cad. Because I had the casino parking lot penny in my shirt pocket, and the cashier's carpet penny in my right pants pocket, and winnings change in my left pants pocket.

I went into Orb K and got my 44 oz Diet Coke. It's like a lesser babka compared to that magical elixir at the gas station chicken store, but it's not bad. I also bought my Golden Ticket scratcher ($60 winner, I found out later). I came back to the car. Because I go down the little ramp from the sidewalk rather than stepping off the curb, I walked around the back of A-Cad to get to the passenger side.

WHAT? Right there by the back left tire of A-Cad was another PENNY! I had not seen it there as I went in. Old Abe looked like he'd been in a fight, and lost. But it was my 4TH PENNY OF THE DAY, by cracky!

Seriously. What are the odds of that?

I know you're all cutting eyes at each other, twirling the crazy finger beside your temple, saying, "Uh huh. Our Val is surely daft." Okay. Maybe you're doing everything but the daft part. But blog buddy Sarah is probably saying that. Not that I know British slang. I didn't even know England is an island until a couple years ago. But still. I think finding FOUR PENNIES in one day, after specifically talking about pennies from heaven, and finding three last something more than mere coincidence.

Even Hick declared, after the fourth penny..."That IS a little unusual."

Today's four pennies, on the porch rail overlooking a yucca plant.

In order, left to right, the casino parking lot, the casino carpet in front of the cashier's area, going into Orb K, and coming out of Orb K.

No dates stand out for me as significant in my life. I can't even see the date on the last one. First is 2012, then 1971, then 1992, the the mutilated one.

Call me crazy. I'm finding a fortune, one cent at a time, but I'm richer in other ways.


  1. And they all have the image of Lincoln...What are the odds?

    1. Joe,
      The odds are probably better than finding four pennies in three different places in a span of six hours.

      It's not like I found Lincoln's actual head!

  2. I don't bother picking up pennies anymore and think we should stop minting them. It costs nearly two cents to make a penny and a penny no longer has any purchasing power.

    1. Who knew that Val has become such a drain on environmental resources?

  3. If it's not $100 from a scratch off, it's pennies--lots of 'em--that are dropped in your path.

    You are a lucky lady, Val.

    1. I am indeed! Found a quarter today by our bathroom door, but Hick claimed that he had dropped one yesterday. A likely story! I gave it to him anyway, because...

      I had a $100 winner today on a ticket I got cashing in that $60 winner from yesterday. PLUS the other tickets I got with money from that $60 winner garnered me a grand total of $165. When you're hot, you're hot. I'm fairly certain that soon I will be NOT. Even Steven, you know.

      I was sorely disappointed, though, to see nary a penny in today's travels.

  4. It is a secret message. You should write a book. Make it a conspiracy theory about Lincoln. It will become a movie ......

    1. Whoopsie, sorry I left you hangin'! Missed this comment back then.

      As far as that book-to-movie idea...Abraham Lincoln vs Zombies has already been done!