Monday, May 16, 2016

Missing Rouge 13

Wondering about that title? Me, too!

In keeping with Hick’s cryptic spy communication system, this message popped up in my email last night. Hmm…Missing Rouge 13? What could that be about?

Let the record show that Val is not a girly-girl. Nor is she an old-lady-gal. No makeup for Val. She walks around au naturel. Face only. Don’t be pervy. So Val knew immediately that none of her rouge was missing. Because she has no rouge.

Is Hick going all Caitlyn Jenner on us? Was HICK’S rouge missing? Perhaps he has a new spy identity to throw those French Toblerone smugglers off his trail. Why would he tell ME about his missing rouge? I certainly wouldn’t take it. Did he have a whole passel of rouges? And 13 were missing?

Or was this, perhaps, a spy case he was working on, and he sent me the email by mistake? No good can come of that! Classified information falling into Val’s hands can only be the beginning of the end. It signals a hastening of the apopadopalyspe.

So…cautiously…I opened that email.

Apparently, Hick is a worse speller than I imagined, or else that devil AutoCorrect is really, really not Hick’s friend. He had sent me a couple of pictures of a car.

A Nissan Rogue.

The 13 was still ambiguous. Was that car a 2013? Or was the asking price $13,000? Were there only 13 miles on the car? The rest of Hick’s message did nothing to clarify the 13.

Missing Rouge 13 low miles a lot of these out there

So…I knew it had nothing to do with makeup, and everything to do with the car that we are seeking to transport The Pony to the University of Oklahoma, rather than spend money fixing the air conditioning and putting tires on his Ford Ranger. Genius got a car upgrade when he went off to college, and his is only two hours away, not eight.

The Pony is easy to please. We'll see what we see.

Perhaps his father will be wearing rouge into the showroom. Perhaps not.

12 comments:

  1. If Hick DOES put on some rougue, will he sing, "I feel pretty"?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If he does, it will be in a very low register. Hick sings along with those two guys in the Statler Brothers and Alabama who do the bass.

      Delete
  2. Maybe he has auto correct?

    (See what I did there?)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "I see," said the blind man, as he picked up his hammer and saw.

      Correctors gonna Correct.

      Delete
  3. That was a cryptic title. Glad you solved the mystery.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Working with the raw material Hick provides is like shooting fish in a barrel. It wouldn't surprise me if next week I saw him literally shooting fish in a barrel.

      Delete
  4. Does Genius or The Pony get Hick's rouge in the will?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It will be split equally, so they can each make one cheek rosy.

      Delete
  5. You are a hoot. You had me at your headline.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Great for a headline. Not so great to try and decipher in real life.

      Delete
  6. I still don't understand it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Clearly, you are not a spy. Decoding says that Hick was trying to tell me about a small car, a Nissan Rogue, not missing rouge. The 13 is still being analyzed by my code-breakers.

      Delete