Well, this is embarrassing...
No, Val hasn't been turned into a Firefox pop-up message. She simply has nothing to complain about tonight. So here are some science jokes for you:
******************************************************
Did you know that if somebody throws sodium chloride on you...
THAT'S A SALT!
******************************************************
Never trust an atom...
THEY MAKE UP EVERYTHING!
******************************************************
What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder?
YOU MAY HAVE GRADUATED, BUT I HAVE MORE DEGREES!
*******************************************************
Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip?
TO GET TO THE SAME SIDE!
*******************************************************
A small piece of sodium lived in a test tube. She fell in love with a Bunsen burner.
"Oh, Bunsen, my flame, I melt whenever I see you."
"Don't worry," said the Bunsen burner. "It's just a phase you're going through."
*******************************************************
If you're not part of the solution...
YOU'RE PART OF THE PRECIPITATE!
*******************************************************
What did one earthquake say to the other earthquake?
IT'S NOT MY FAULT!
********************************************************
Two atoms walk into a bar. One of them is bumped by another customer.
"I think I
lost an electron!"
"Really!" the other replies. "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I
'm absolutely positive."
*********************************************************
There. That was relatively painless, now wasn't it?
Yeah, except now I have to Google mobius strip?
ReplyDeleteBwahahahahaha MOBIUS STRIP! That's a good one!!
ReplyDeleteI prefer grousing to guffawing right now. I guess I'll have to find someone else's blog to get my bile fix...
ReplyDeleteThe science of men and women: Val told Hick she liked attentive men.
ReplyDelete"Did you hear me?" she asked. "Yes, you'd like a tent of men." Hick replied.
Losing an electron is a terrible, terrible thing. I hear this is going on all over the country. Politicians spend hours and hours campaigning and spend thousands of dollars to prove their worth as a candidate. And now you tell me they can loose their electron just by bumping into the wrong lady at a bar? What? What? Electron. Well, why didn't you say so! Never mind.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the laughs.
ReplyDeletejoeh,
ReplyDeleteSorry for taking those extra two minutes out of your life. I hope it didn't drive you to a dirty-water cocktail.
*****
Sioux,
If you hang around long enough, you're sure to get it here.
*****
Linda,
That is exactly what Hick would say! You must be remote-viewing our verbal sparring matches.
*****
Leenie,
So terribly true!
*****
Stephen,
Science humor: just one more service Val provides.
I have to confess that I was a little startled and a bit confused. I read the title wrong ........ I thought election was a different word. I thought you might be making light of an ad for Cialis.
ReplyDeleteKathy,
ReplyDeletePardon the confusion. I left out a letter. Leenie made do admirably, inserting her own "i". You, however, changed a letter that was already present. I think you might have put on my bifocals by mistake. I have since corrected the headline error. I haven't made this big a mistake since my first year of teaching when I wrote my name on the board, right above, "Sciene Teacher." Can you believe that no 7th graders or 9th graders corrected me all day?
Val, I read this the other day but wasn't signed in and was ......can you believe this....too lazy to sign in so that I COULD leave a comment??? Well, you're in luck tonight because I'm already signed in....thus I can easily leave a comment....but can't think of anything droll enough.....* sigh....*
ReplyDeleteBecky,
ReplyDeleteI suppose there's some truth to that "timing is everything" quote.