Hick. The blog post generator that keeps on giving.
Remember how Hick was prohibited from bringing home more FREE food from the Ponytail Guy? I'm sure you remember! It was only yesterday that I told you about it! And also about Hick's failure to abide by my arbitrary rules. If we were living during the time of Prohibition, I'm pretty sure The Pony would not get to have his nightly two-hour soak in the big triangle bathtub, due to Hick having it full of bathtub gin! I think Hick's picture might be in the dictionary beside "noncompliance."
Anyhoo... The Ponytail Guy delivers his goodies on Friday mornings. On Thursday evening, I got a text from Hick:
"Ponytail Guy's going to have more egg rolls this week I'm going to get a box of them"
The Pony has instructions to be at the Storage Unit Store by 8:30, to bring the egg rolls home, open the box of 96, and apportion them into gallon freezer bags. Then fit them into the mini freezer in the laundry room. I'm pretty sure we still have 70-something of the last box of egg rolls left.
It looks like Hick is stocking up for the Apopadopalyspe. That would be what MOST people call the Apocalypse. Don't you worry about Thevictorians. We won't choke on those egg rolls. We will swill Sparkling Grape Juice to wash them down.
The Sparkling Grape Juice wasn't free. Hick bought it at the auction. 12 BOTTLES! He couldn't pass it up, for the low cost of $8.00. That's for all 12 bottles. I looked it up on Walmart's website, and saw a "Variety Pack" of 4 bottles for $14.23. Oh, and it was out of stock. I guess Hick got a good deal.
WE will ride out the Apopadopalyspe on tuna, egg rolls, and sparkling grape juice.
You're on your own.
I'd skip the grape juice.
ReplyDeleteMore for Hick and The Pony! I guess they are fans of high fructose corn syrup.
DeleteYou're going to need a bucket of Duc's Sauce!
ReplyDeleteYou ain't a-woofin'! I imagine Hick will find it at the auction some day. Probably a case of 12 buckets. Then he'll need more egg rolls.
DeleteI will have water with the tuna and some of the egg rolls.
ReplyDeleteDon't expect your water in a bottle. We actually have really good well water. No taste at all. Of course, the lead content may kill you before the Fukushima tuna radiation. They don't call our area the Lead Belt for nothing!
DeleteYou can have a main course of egg rolls, and two sides. Which are also egg rolls.
That's a bargain for the grape juice! I do hope the apocalypse doesn't actually happen though. I don't have as much storage space as you and certainly no Shacky-Town for extra room.
ReplyDeleteI don't plan on it happening any time soon. Hick started getting these ideas years ago, when those PREPPER shows were all the rage on TV.
DeleteYou have the commodoties, so beware the neighbors coming to rob your larder.
ReplyDeleteWe shall defend our stash by pelting the invaders with frozen egg rolls!
DeleteJust don't mention what I said about a stand for you to sell them!
ReplyDeleteYeah, a stand might make us a target. A blinking beacon beckoning brutes to break in!
Delete