Winging It (NOT!)

Yes, I knew the week was off to a bad start with my cutting-the-cheese faux pas on Sunday.

Then on Monday, I had a very busy day at school, what with duty before and after, and getting my room ready for a sub Tuesday, and taking The Pony to an appointment at 5:00, knowing we would not be home until 7:00.

I was really tired, and the temperature was in the low 20s. While I waited in T-Hoe for The Pony to emerge, I covered myself with my parking-lot-duty coat. It's SO warm. Purple with quilted tiny squares. With a hood lined with really soft gray stuff. I put it over me, the hood material by my chin. So toasty, what with the heated leather seats still emanating warmth like coals beneath my butt. BUT I WAS AFRAID TO FALL ASLEEP! What if two young policemen came and tapped on my window, and took my license with that really REALLY bad picture of me, and then asked me to step out of T-Hoe into the freezing cold? I admit that I surreptitiously stole about two winks while the snow showers swirled in the dusk and the radio played some Gordon Lightfoot on the Sirius XM 70s station. Every highway seems to slip away on you...

Lucky for me, I didn't have to cook supper. The Pony wanted to drive through Rally's, which is made for driving through. I was planning on some delectable chicken wings left over from Hick's Super Bowl snacks. And Hick had the Li'l Smokies in BBQ sauce left over, and who knows what else he'd put away after his feast.

Dang! The Pony seemed to be taking longer than usual. I really had to pee. Never mind that I went right before we left school. We'd already been to the post office to mail Genius's Valentine, and to a convenience store for gas, and to the bank for the weekly cash allowance for Hick, because it was on the way. There's a bathroom in the hallway of the office where The Pony goes. Not goes to the bathroom! Goes for his appointment. But he said the waiting area has been crowded with little kids lately. I was not going in there to wade through unchecked pre-tweens.

At last The Pony came out, taking his own sweet time texting across the parking lot. Then we hit Rally's for a cheeseburger and a funnel cake. They don't have a public restroom, you know. So I headed for Sonic. Not to buy anything. Just to use their outside bathroom. I've spent many a penny on their outrageously-priced Route 44's over the years. They owe me a pee, in my opinion. I parked at the end, and found their women's room pleasantly warm, with a little heater in the wall. The people in the black pickup truck silently judging me didn't even matter.

We made it home through the showering snow by 7:00. The Pony was sated. I rummaged around in Frig II looking for those wings. Hmph! Not a wing to be found! I asked Hick if he'd seen them. Oh. He ate them all ON SUPER BOWL SUNDAY! Hick ate ten wings. Not that ten wings is a Takeru-Kobayashi-size training meal. But Hick had all that other food on Super Bowl night! The Li'l Smokies, and pepper-and-garlic steak fries (half of a half of a bag), Ruffles and Hidden Valley Ranch dip, restaurant-style tortilla chips and queso dip, sugar-free sugar cookies, and sugar-free oatmeal cookies. They were the BIG wings, too. The Tyson Anytizer bone-in wings. Big strong wings, from chickens that might have been part pterodactyl, chickens able to fly like transport planes carrying heavy equipment, over the ocean.

Sigh.

Just what I wanted to do, make my own meal when I got home at 7:00 p.m. I set to work on some super nachos. Let the record show that it took 20 minutes. Maybe 30. Because Hick wanted to chat while sitting in his La-Z-Boy with me in the kitchen cutting up Saturday's leftover boneless skinless chicken breast for nacho topping.

Yeah. Wait until you hear about Tuesday.