Monday, November 21, 2016

Because That's How Val Rolls

Hick has still not been forthcoming with the stories he was so excited to tell me upon his arrival in Sweden. At least he wrote them down in his little black (note)book that he carries for his expense report. So at some point, if he doesn't read "flaming globes of Sigmund," you will be privy (heh, heh, I said PRIVY) to those experiences.

Until then, Hick is at Val's mercy. As it should be.

The week after he returned from this overseas jaunt, Hick did indeed turn in his expense report. He had the reimbursement check back within two days, and left it on the kitchen counter for me to find when I got up. You know. Rather than handing it to me the night before. He also left me a note. On the check stub.

Lest you think that Hick has torn out my kitchen counter and installed one made of rough-hewn oak, that picture was snapped out on the porch rail, because my new hand-me-down phone does not take good pictures indoors.

Notice that Hick is very specific in the amount that he (thinks he) is owed. Not that it's a lot of money he's claiming. It's only 4.5% of the total expenditure. My question is WHY does Hick think that he's entitled to this cut of the money?

Don't think I begrudge Hick compensation for his time. I believe his employer takes care of that. He is paid a salary. He can take a day off at the drop of a hat if he has an emergency, or even a broken well pump that needs fixing, and not be docked in pay or vacation days. His position is technically considered management, and not an hourly worker, and has benefits and unwritten duties commensurate with such.

My point is that the gas for Hick's mileage to the airport and back was put on our credit card. The vehicle he drove was paid for and insured and upkept by money from our checking account. So I am unsure why Hick thinks this money is due directly to him. I see it as paying back expenses that we expended. Not expenses that he paid out of his pocket.

Furthermore, when I brought this scenario to Hick's attention, broaching the topic with,  
"I thought you charged your gas on our credit card, and it was on the bill I just paid..."

Hick quickly replied, "Oh, I don't care if you keep the $20 for gas!"

Meaning that he gave up TOO easily! And acted like I was pocketing that money, as a GIFT from him, due to his magnanimity.

Anyhoo...I put the expense check in the bank, and kept out $200 to give Hick. Which I laid on the kitchen counter overnight.

He'd better appreciate my magnanimity.


  1. YOu should put a towel over it.

    1. Or one of his snacks, so he'll be sure to find it!!

    2. Or, if I want to keep it, I could put it on the floor where he has to step over it. Because I guarantee you Hick never picks anything up off the floor.

      OR, I could put it right beside the telephone! It would be there for when I feel especially gambly, and want some extra scratch-off ticket money.

  2. If he's smart, he will appreciate it.

    1. He should also appreciate the paint sprayer I let him buy today for over $200. Which didn't come out of his MILEAGE money.

  3. Replies
    1. Well, as we all know, Val IS a giver...

  4. Replies
    1. I see no point in writing something that will remain unread, and stay where I put it until the paper decays or spontaneously combusts from the remnants of gas station chicken on my fingers.

  5. Replies
    1. Here's the Val's Notes version:

      SNAP OUT OF IT! (Thanks to Cher in "Moonstruck.")

      Hick said he should get part of the Sweden trip reimbursement money for his mileage that he drove to the airport. Even though it was paid by our joint credit card, then checking account. He was not out any money. Yet he acted like he was doing me a favor by saying I could keep $20 of it for the gas.

      I did HIM a favor by giving him the money anyway, even though he did not deserve it.

      The Hick's Notes version:

      "I scammed $200 of the reimbursement money from Val, to use for my Goodwill shopping sprees, by saying I needed it for mileage."