Hey! Did you hear a "TWANG" around 8:45 a.m. central standard time?
That was the sound of Val Thevictorian's heart growing three sizes today. Whoa! Let me help you up. Here. Try these smelling salts.
Yes, Val has a renewed faith in the human race. She might just put off breaking ground on that proposed handbasket factory for a couple more weeks.
I arose early on my Saturday, just like last Saturday, for The Pony. No biscuit-and-gravy breakfast this morning. Nothing official. The Pony wanted to use his grandma's high-speed internet to download a computer game he bought last Wednesday. It has 14.8 gigabytes, according to him, though I wouldn't know a gigabyte if it took a bite out of my gigabutt. Since he had his bowling league at noon, I dropped him off at Mom's house before I really wanted to be out of bed.
To treat myself on the way home, after running in Walmart for soup starter mix, and dropping in Save A Lot for hamburger and vegetables, I cashed in some winning scratch-off tickets at Casey's General Store. They're not my usual lottery-ticket trading place, but they're my number two ticket trader.
As I started out the door, a man and teenage boy came in. The boy stopped, went back out, and held the door open for me to exit. He was probably 15-16 years old, taller than my Pony.
"Thank you."
"You're welcome, ma'am."
There was a time when I would have been incensed that he called me ma'am. But now that I AM a ma'am, I found it quite respectful.
There may still be hope for the future of civilization.
Just when you think the world is about to stop spinning, someone surprises you. Happy Weekend!
ReplyDeleteMaybe he thought you were a cougar on the prowl, and he is practicing for when he is an adult and can be someone's cub...
ReplyDeleteOr maybe he heard you are retiring after next year, he's looking for a tutor to help him in Science, he had the suspicion you were a Science teacher, and he is buttering you up for a future request for tutelage...
Or maybe you reminded him of his own sweet, sweet mother, and he was treating you the way he treats her...
Or (the most likely), the Earth has slipped off its axis in a helter-skelter way, sending those swine swooping through the sky...
(And now I return to my unfrozen not-heaven, where I'm frantically working on report cards.)
Please send him my way to camp, then maybe he could teach the rest ....
ReplyDeleteThey do that in Jersey all the time...then they pick your pocket.
ReplyDeleteStephen,
ReplyDeletePerhaps there has been some extreme sunspot activity...solar flares...a solar wind that blows no good. The magnetosphere has been breached!
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Sioux,
Yuck. Brain bleach!
I will not consider freelancing after retirement. That knowledge is mine, ALL MINE, and nobody shall reap its benefits.
I still go with solar flare energy as the culprit.
Report cards? Why don't you just scrawl their grades on the cave wall with paint from crushed berries? WE use the computer for a printout here in backwards Backroads...
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Kathy,
I fear he would be outnumbered by those little Mudder buckaroos who were searching your premises for bomb-making materials.
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joeh,
As long as they dance a choreographed routine and sing, "You've got to pick a pocket or two, boys, you've got to pick a pocket or two!" Because then I will be forewarned.