It's Sunday. So Hick parked his butt on a church pew. Oh, he didn't go to church. He parked it on the church pew he got at an auction, and put on the front porch. He was on his lunch break from mowing the yard. I asked if he'd seen my sweet, sweet Juno. She was mysteriously absent all morning. Hick declared that he had seen her, and that he had given her a treat. He bought some dog biscuits and stashed them in the red Igloo cooler on the side porch by the garage. I guess that was his way of telling me that I should cease and desist with the kitty kibble snacks every evening.
Anyway, that did not solve the problem of Juno. Hick said he didn't want to see her, because she'd be a pest while he was eating his lunch on the front porch church pew. At first, when he'd mentioned the treat, I though he might have torn off a crust of bread to give her. She would have run around to the back porch and into her very special dog house with her treat, because she would not want Ann the black german shepherd to get a crumb of it. Then Hick mentioned the dog biscuits.
"So you didn't JUST giver her a treat."
"No. That was earlier. She's around here somewhere."
"I didn't see her when I left for town, or when I came back. She always greets me. You were on the lawnmower, so I knew she wasn't with you."
"I don't know where she is. Unless she snuck into the BARn while I was over there. She might be closed up in the BARn. I'll check later."
Does anybody else catch a whiff of conspiracy? Or smell a rat?
Epilogue:
Five hours later. Sweet, sweet Juno has reared her black silky (non-egg-stealing) head.
"So, did you find Juno?"
"Yeah."
"Where was she?"
"In her house, I think."
"What do you mean, YOU THINK? Did you see her in her house?"
"No. She came around the porch while I was grilling the steaks."
I doubt that my sweet, sweet Juno received a treat upon her reappearance.
Would Hick report (honestly) that Juno had been found, locked up and held captive, in the BARn?
ReplyDeleteI wonder...
I forgot to mention that I think Hick is the pompatuous of BARns...
ReplyDeleteHick is a sly one. Toss that doggy another bone.
ReplyDeleteI'm inclined to agree with Sioux.
ReplyDeleteToo bad Juno can't talk and let us know what really happened.
ReplyDeleteSioux,
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely not! That would give me so much ammunition in her defense, like that time he lost her down by the creek. I really need to bring that incident up again. I'll wait until he next casts aspersions on her (alleged) dietary supplements and silky coat.
Yes. He IS the pompatus of BARns. I'm surprised he doesn't hang out a shingle and pass out business cards.
*****
Linda,
My sweet, sweet Juno is also psychic. Two days before Hick bought the dog biscuits to put in the Igloo cooler, she was nosing at the Igloo cooler! Instead of trying to guide my hand up to the kitty kibble in the shelf above it. Last summer, Hick had put dog biscuits in there, but Juno had not shown an interest in that cooler since they were long gone.
******
joeh,
You and Hick seem to share some thought processes, so that comes as no surprise. Why confess when there's hope for acquittal once all the evidence is compiled?
*****
Stephen,
OH! That would be SO great if my sweet, sweet Juno could talk! What best friends we would be, ganging up on Hick to chastise him with TWO mouths instead of one!